Can You Deal?
by Nocturnal Rose
Summary: Hermione witnesses Snape at a Death Eater meeting and is plagued by nightmares. Albus orders Snape to help Hermione deal certain events that happen, tension surfaces and secrets are revealed.Rewritten and I'm going to finsh it.
1. Nightmares and Cries for help

Title: Can You Deal?

Author: Nocturnal Rose

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry potter.

A/N: This is the last time I am going to re-post any chapters. I found a beta. She fixed it for me. YAY. Read me.

Chapter 1 Nightmares and Cries for help

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_Though she had been here before, she couldn't quite place when. The air was thick with fog and a feeling of pain seemed to surround her. The green grass squished under her bare feet. The only sound was a woman screaming. The women's screams seemed to flood from the gathering of trees, making her pause slightly. Still, she proceeded on, discarding the caution she should have had as the_ _screams continued._

_She was walking right into the bustle of trees. Minutes later a clearing came into sight, as she stepped out of the dark gathering of trees. Her eyes went straight to the focal point: figures in black capes and hoods, adorned with masks could be seen vaguely hiding their identity. The figures were, standing in a circle, through the thickening haze. Once again she carried on, stepping hesitantly._

_As she advanced towards the tight circle of dark figures, the screams of the woman were becoming more frequent and distinct. During the intervals between the cries of pain, the women's hoarse voice could be heard pleading for her death. She had heard that voice before it was familiar but she couldn't place it._

A twig snapped under her feet_ and all the darkly capped heads snapped up, suddenly aware of an uninvited guest. The torture ceased abruptly, however, a low moaning could still be heard. The sea of figures parted, giving her a view of the makeshift torture chamber were the woman's body laid in the center._

_The girl walked towards the parted sea of figures, looking towards the woman's body lying lifelessly on the ground. Blood coated the area around the body, finally her eyes snapped to a man standing above the woman's prone figure, gazing down at it. As she walked towards the man in the center and looked down once again at the body covered in dirt, grime and coated in blood. He looked up and stared straight into her eyes. Her body froze; her mind lost. Her mouth fell open and a gasp escaped when she saw to whom it was. It was him; the one from her nightmares. He was here, and he was doing this; his dark eyes showed no remorse, but instead glittered fully despite the dim light A since of de'ejv came over her. Frantically, she peered down, trying to discover the identity of the injured women, but it was useless. She could feel him watching her, his eyes demanding her focus. _

_She tried concentrated on the bloody ground, the other capped figures still there watching silently at their silent interaction. Her gaze traveled slowly, finding and following the spills of blood and the tracks of disrupted dirt. Her eyes encountered a pool of what looked to be, despite the clumps of blood that matted it, light honey-colored curls. A familiar feeling once again filled her mind, glancing quickly towards the woman's face. Her face was dirty, blood crusted, pale skin coloring, Her mind wasn't working. She recognized this person but she couldn't conjure any knowledge. Glancing to the women's eyes sorrow filled her at the look of acceptance that seemed to fill them. The woman looked to have accepted that she was going to die. The woman was no longer fighting, no longer pleading, just silent. Her eyes were a honey brown just like her hair. She recognized those eyes so well, they stared back at her every morning from the bathroom mirror. A horror-filled, shriek flew from her lips she took an involuntary step beck from her body._

_She was the woman. _

Hermione sat up quickly gasping for air, she glanced around the room. She was safe. She was in her bed in the Gryffindor girl's dorm room, at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It had just been a dream. She shuddered when the realness of the dream came back to. She could still smell the blood. She could still feel the power that his eyes held over her, she could still see the look in his eyes, the look of acceptance that had befallen her face as she'd lain there lifelessly. She could still here her own hoarse voice pleading for death.

She didn't understand where these dreams were coming from. Were they like Harry's A look into the future? It couldn't have already happened, she would remember if it did. Right?

Breaking down suddenly she began sobbing with fright and exhaustion, trying to calm down she forced herself to lie back down and try to get some rest. Though she knew she wouldn't see any rest tonight.

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Professor Minerva McGonagall sat in the Headmaster's office, lines of worry etched harshly across her aging features. That morning Miss Brown, along with the other occupants of Miss. Granger's dorm, had come to her office and informed her of Hermione Granger's strange daily and nightly habits, which were preventing the other girls from sleeping and even functioning normally. Miss Brown informed her that Hermione would thrash about in her bed, cry out in sleep, sob while she dreamed, and wake up screaming. Sometimes at meals or in the common room, she would suddenly space out and then start sobbing.

"Something has to be done, for the good of Gryffindor,"' Miss Brown had stated. "Professor McGonagall, please, please, please do something about Hermione. We know something happened that night. You don't need to tell us, but she barely ever talks, not even to Ron or Harry. You told us to report any strange behavior, so here I am. You have to do something she's driving us up the wall," stated Lavender Brown, trying hard not to disclose her worry for Hermione.

"Please don't worry, Miss Brown, something will be done," replied a slightly distressed Professor McGonagall. "But in the mean time don't you have a class you need to attend? We wouldn't want you falling behind because of you concern for Miss Granger, now would we?"

"No Professor, absolutely not," Lavender replied with a sour look on her face

"Well then get to class I must go inform the Headmaster," she stated as she hurried her through her office doors.

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Professor McGonagall was waiting for a comment from the headmaster on her recollection from earlier that day. She couldn't help but wonder if Miss. Granger would ever be the same.

She was such a bright young pupil, so eager to learn, and her mind was always buzzing with knowledge and questions about the magical world. It gave her a certain light that had always shined so brightly in her eyes. After that night, however, the light flickered, and then disappeared without a trace. She withdrew from life socially and academically. She barricaded herself into a shell of solitude no one knew she possessed. She became quiet, and her eagerness to learn had all but vanished. She sat in class as though she was somewhere else and there was no one around her.

Harry, Ron, and Ginny had come to her two days after the girl's return, stating that Hermione was different and was acting really odd. She wouldn't even acknowledge their presence. They had pleaded with her to tell them what happened. Yet, she refused.

She just couldn't; she'd made a vow.

_"Please Professor, tell us what happened to Hermione. We have to help her," begged an almost desperate Harry as Ron and Ginny nodded in agreement._

"I'm sorry to inform you three of this, but that information is something I can't discuss without Miss Granger's consent. If Miss Granger chooses to tell you what happened, so be it. But, let it be known I will not disclose information that does not belong to you," she told them, earning a glare from each of them.

"Now don't you all have classes to be in right now?" Not waiting for them to answer, she continued. "Your thoughtfulness for you friend is greatly appreciated, but please believe me when I say that Miss Granger will be back to normal in no time. Now off to class you three."  


That had been 4 weeks ago. She should have brought it up to Albus sooner. If she had, maybe this could all have been prevented.

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Albus Dumbledore was growing wary from the ongoing war. The conflicts and confrontations were growing more and more frequent and depressing each day. The hope that was once felt strongly towards the beginning of Voldmort's rebirth was now at the bottom of the barrel. The side of light had suffered a great loss for the future.

Miss Granger had been a voice of hope during the darker days. Always filled with such hopes of winning this war, they were diminished by one fateful act that wouldn't be quickly forgotten.

People were taking notice of Miss Granger's new attitude towards life, and they were demanding answers. What once was the brightest pupil in this century now was little more than a skeleton of the young, vibrant girl she had been. It was time to call in the only man who could help her, the man who started it all—

Severus Snape.

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The room was lit only by a small candle, yet one could still see the plush forest green carpet, the black bed hangings, the leather sofa, and the king size bed dressed in silks and satins colored in forest greens, dark silvers, and blacks. The room was distinctly quiet, yet rustlings from the bed could be heard. Tossing and turning, incoherent words floated through the darkness of the dungeons.

The veil of silence was finally broken by a shout of the word "HERMIONE!" Then all was quiet recapturing of breath. The body moved from the bed toward the bathroom for a cool shower. Almost the second his fingers brushed the door, the Headmaster's voice drifted from the dying flames of the fire place and resounded throughout the room.

"Severus, Severus. Are you awake?" Albus asked from the floo network.

Silently, Severus cursed the older wizard, as he looked towards a clock. It read 2:05 am.

"Yes, Albus, you're not the only soul awake at this ungodly hour of the morning," replied Severus, getting up and walking to his liquor cabinet to pour himself a brandy.

"Good, good. We have things we need to discus, my boy," stated Albus, a small smile playing about his lips as he watched the grumpy, sarcastic man trying to get rid of him with unsuccessful attempts.

"Do you realize it is two in the morning! Couldn't it wait until later? I'd like to try and get some more sleep before my day is ruined further," he spoke firmly but the weariness wore through.

"No, the matters we have to discuss are urgent they can't be pushed aside or delayed any longer," Dumbledore replied, his smile disappearing momentarily at the mention of his serious reason for calling.

"Very well then," he agreed reluctantly. "I'll floo up to your office as soon as I'm dressed," replied a very annoyed Potions Master.

"Very good, my boy. I will see you momentarily," replied the amused headmaster.

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"Very well, I'll do it," sighed a very defeat Potions Master.

"Excellent, now would you like a chocolate frog?" asked the headmaster the twinkle back gleaming brightly in his eyes.

"No, no thank you," Severus replied exasperatedly, cursing the old man's love for sweets silently.

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The Gryffindor table was buzzing with excitement. Today was Saturday and the first Hogsmeade visit of the year. Harry, along with his girlfriend Ginny, talked with Ron and his girlfriend Lavender. Every once and a while, they tried to bring Hermione into the conversation.

She didn't talk, she didn't eat, and she didn't even look up from her plate until she felt a presence behind her.

"Miss Granger," the voice of Professor McGonagall spoke from behind her.

Hermione turned around and looked up in response.

"The headmaster requests your presence in his office immediately after breakfast," stated the Deputy Headmistress. Without waiting for a reply, she turned on her heel and headed off to the staff table.

A chorus of complaints from Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Lavender followed in her wake.

"Hermione, this sucks. Now you can't come with us," stated Ron. Harry, Ginny and Lavender nodded their heads in agreement.

Hermione didn't feel the need to inform him that she had never planned on going; it was easier to let him think what he would.

Hermione ignored them, of course, and went back to moving her food around, trying to make it seem as if she was eating something. Sighing she pushed her plate away from her and got up. She walked towards the Headmaster's office. There was no point in delaying their meeting.

Harry, Ron, Ginny and Lavender all looked on after her, slightly offended at her abrupt exit.

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As Hermione entered the Headmasters office, she saw Professor Dumbledore and McGonagall.

And him.

He was there, sitting in front of the most powerful wizard, and no one was stopping him. Didn't they know what he did to her, what he was still doing to her?

"Ah, Miss Granger," the headmaster spoke. Suddenly he glanced up at her without warning. Their eyes met.

She froze in terror.

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	2. Secrets Revealed

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

I've rewritten it, and I'm determined to Finnish it!

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"Miss Granger," Professor Dumbledore said and smiled, though the familiar twinkle amidst the soft blue had disappeared from his eyes as he noticed her tense posture, and frightened glances at his colleague. "Please have a seat," he added, and motioned to the empty chair.

Hermione tentatively excepted the seat flanked by those of Professors McGonagall and Snape. She felt boxed in, and trapped. They were doing it again. They just wanted to make her suffer.

Hermione's thoughts of panic were cut short by Dumbledore clearing his throat, Hermione's heads snapped up in response, readily.

"I suppose your wondering why I had asked you here then?" Hermione nodded silently. "As I thought. Well my dear there is a lot that needs to be said, and a lot that needs to be done, and little time to do it." Dumbledore added his voice weary with age. Never had Hermione heard him so defeated.

Hermione looked questioningly at him, and spared glances to both sides of her he sat staring silently ahead, jaw clenched, Her head of house gave her glances of pity however, she seemed the only one confused.

Again Professor Dumbledore cleared his throat drawing the attention back to himself. "What needs to be exposed, may be something of a mystery to you." Dumbledore nodded in the direction of Professor Snape, telling him it was time to talk.

"Miss Granger," he acknowledged her with a sarcastic smirk, "What, exactly do you remember from the night of October 31st?"

Hermione bit her tongue, this had to be some sort of trick, some sort of game he was playing with her. She remembered everything just fine! First she had finished her homework early so that she could have a stress-free night, then she, Harry and Ron had made their way down to dinner. Halfway there, their girlfriends, Lavender and Ginny, had caught up with them. They began chatting quietly together, mostly excluding Hermione, although not meaning to ignore her. Then she heard a noise, and had wondered towards the sound to investigate. It had been Malfoy, who was holding a heavy looking book under his right arm. Suddenly her mind was blank with what happened next, she couldn't remember anything until two days later, when she woke up in the hospital wing.

'What the hell had happened? And why couldn't she remember?' These questions flitted across her mind, followed closely by, 'What did he have to do with it?' Panic began to seize her.

Snape could see the spark of recognition then the flicker of defeat. The young woman understood now that there was much to tell, much to hear, and lots to be done.

"Well, Miss Granger," he asked in a mocking tone, oddly laced with a hint of gentleness, "would you care to tell us of your memories from the 31st?"

"I... I don't remember" Hermione said quietly, the uncertainty clear in her voice when it wavered.

"What was that Miss Granger?" he questioned though he new the answer. He only prayed by some miracle he was wrong.

"I said I don't remember," Hermione said, this time louder and firmer, but still with a touch of hesitation and weariness.

"Ah, yes! Precisely as we had suspected," the headmaster cut in before the feared potion master could come back with a sure-to-be harsh comment. They were trying to help Hermione, not tear her down. However, he knew, beneath all that sarcasm, the potions master was concerned for her. He just wouldn't admit it. " Here, now, lets begin do you remember up to where you heard a noise and went to investigate? And you said you encountered young Mister Malfoy?" Dumbledore asked searching her eyes.

"Yes, sir I do, but after that... there's nothing... until I woke up in the hospital wing two days later. You said I had... had a nasty fall," Hermione stated quietly hoping this was all a dream, what was going on.

"Well, the same night we were celebrating, the Dark Lord was planning festivities of his own." He saw Snape flinch but continued. "I assume that he wanted a muggle-born for the nights 'entertainment'. One that would leave a mark on the side of the Order."

Things were all started to click into place. Hermione was figuring out everything much too quickly for her liking.

"He happened to choose you, Miss Granger," Dumbledore stated, waiting a moment for everything to sink in. "Young mister Malfoy was to capture you and bring you to that nights Death Eater gathering, wear he was to be given the Dark Mark for his serves to Voldmorts forces." The headmaster said a small frown on his brow. "I don't know the extent of what happened to you that night, only Professor Snape knows. But the next morning you and Professor Snape were found walking into Hogwarts grounds. He was carrying you, and you were shaking like a leaf. Before you passed out." The headmaster Finished.

"You were so hysterical that Professor McGonagall and Poppy had to hold you down. It got to the point where the only thing we could do to calm you was cast a memory charm." A look of horror-filled understanding crossed her face. Dumbledore continued. "I've come to believe the dreams you've been having, are a twisted subconscious version of that night."

And suddenly it all made since, the dreams filled with realness, the forgotten feeling. She looked over at Professor Snape and noticed he was stiff as could possibly be imagined, sitting rigidly as if spikes were being driven into his backside. Hermione momentarily felt sorry for him, but then the feeling was gone again as the jumbled thoughts began to filter through her mind.

Hermione's mind was so busy filtering through all of her knew found answers that she didn't reply verbally to the professor Dumbledore question, yet subconsciously gave him a solemn nod and continued sorting things through in mind.

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	3. Worries and Weariness

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

I've rewritten it and I'm determined to finish it!

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She had given the headmaster a solemn nod as her answer, not even fully aware of what she had done. When it hit her she could only hope that she would find peace with his help. As she headed to the Gryffindor common room she wondered how things got so complicated so fast. She had come to Hogwarts ready to prove herself, to be known, to be a prized pupil. She did, she is, and she had. But now all she wanted was to disappear and be forgotten. For the first time in her life since discovering she was a witch she couldn't help but wonder if her life would have been better if she had never come to Hogwarts.

The days and nights since that horrific accident had been unbearable the slightest thing could, and did, set her off. She didn't like being this way, she didn't like treating her friends as she did, always keeping them at a distance never speaking to anyone, but what else was she to do? They wouldn't understand the thoughts and feelings she went through her mind without reason. Know one could. Well maybe someone, but he was the one who started it all. So she couldn't go to him right?

She wouldn't have gone to him willingly, but now with the headmaster's interference she had to. Wasn't it enough that she had to see him in class 4 days a week and once for a double? Why did they have to torture her like this? What had she done to deserve this? Did they think they were helping, cause they weren't? Were they insane? Were they working with him and the dark lord, in trying to make her go crazy? If that were the case, they were doing a fine job.

Then she spoke the password to enter the Gryffindor common room. It was bustling with activity. She ignored it all and headed for her dorm.

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"Well, Albus, Minerva, if you don't mind, I think I shall take my leave," stated the thoroughly defeated potions master as he rose from his seat and walked towards the floo.

"Not at all Severus my dear boy, not at all." Replied the jolly headmaster, his signature twinkle firmly in place.

"Night Severus, do try to get some rest dear you look like the un-dead," stated Minerva with a hint of concern.

"Albus, Minerva." The potion master spoke and gave a curt nod as the floo powder swept him away.

The room became silent, but not uncomfortably so. Professor McGonagall could be seen with a stern expression on her face, her mind racing with thoughts and doubts, and Professor Dumbledore with a similar expression, yet with a merry twinkle in his eyes, as though waiting for something. And that something came soon.

"Albus are you sure that was wise?" asked a concerned professor. "She hasn't talked to anyone since that night and you want to put her with the one who started this, for what? A way to drive her to the edge? Making her distance herself even further? Questioning her sanity?" she finished with a frantic tone

"My dear Minerva, please clam down. Now you know I would never do anything intentionally to hurt a student, or anyone else for that matter. Don't tell me you have lost faith in me already?" he asked jokingly, a twinkle visible in his vivid blue eyes.

"No Albus, I haven't," she replied seriously, "It's just that I think of Hermione as a daughter of sorts. She reminds me very much of myself at her age. I just want to protect her. But at the same time, as her teacher and head of house I must guide and support her. Its nearly impossible if she rarely speaks to me anymore, never tells me anything. I'm not sure how to look after her when she doesn't let me in. I'm at a loss on what to do. I just wanted her to be able to live a normal life after that night, but now her life is anything but. Unfortunately with Voldemort around, it hardly seems possible, even if that night had never occurred." Minerva replied placing her head in her hands and sighed in defeat.

"Hush now my love, All will be well in time, do not trouble yourself" Albus assured her, walking around his desk to stand in back of Minerva's chair he gently began stroking her back soothingly as to relax her. "In time all will be made right again. No need to burden yourself with my troubles," Albus replied gently "No, I do believe I am to blame and must right things on my own," he added sadly. But his sad smile faded and a small grin replaced it.

"Now, it is my understanding that being out after curfew could result in detentions. Isn't it about time for all good little head mistresses to return to their quarters?" Albus asked, grinning down at her playfully.

She smacked his arm playfully but replied seriously, "I probably should be going, I do, after all, have classes tomorrow." She stood slowly and headed towards the door, but turned back and added, "Promise me you won't stay up all night thinking." Minerva asked concern for him shining threw her serious face.

"What if I'm thinking about you?" he said, a mischievous glint shinning from behind his half-moon glasses.

She rolled her eyes in response, but was not able to hid a small smile that graced her lips.

He walked across the room and putting his arms around her gave her a peck on the forehead. She pushed him roughly away saying, "Get off me you old fool." Though the words were harsh she said them tenderly and Albus didn't let go. Instead his kissed her again.

"Goon night Albus," she said finally, a little tint gracing her cheeks. Then, quickly, she turned and disappeared out the door, waving a little goodbye.

"'Night my love sleep well for you will need your strength in the up coming weeks," The headmaster whispered quietly to the empty doorway.

Then moved back towards his desk for a long night of worrying.

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	4. The final Blow

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

I've rewritten it and I am determined to finish it!

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As Hermione calmly walked down the steps from the Gryffindor common room to breakfast, she looked normal. Of the last few weeks no one could see all the emotional turmoil she was going through at this moment, no one wanted to.

Making her way to the portrait of the fat lady, she was caught off guard when it swung open and on the other side stood her head of house.

"Hermione, just the student I was looking for. This way if you please," she commanded curtly and turned not waiting for a response. She then proceeded quickly towards her office with Hermione trailing quickly after her in confusion.

Once they entered the deputy headmistress's office she motioned for Hermione to take a chair.

"Would you like some tea Hermione?"

Hermione shook her head no, and waited patiently as her McGonagall poured herself a cup and reveal the reason for the meeting.

"The Headmaster has asked me to inform you of your meeting with Professor Snape tonight after dinner." Professor McGonagall said searching Hermione's face for a sign emotional turmoil. But all she saw was slight confusion.

"You do remember Professor Dumbledore asking you if you would mind meeting with Professor Snape, in that the hopes that you will be able to set the record straight and recover your memories. About that night, I mean, so you will be able to over come it and move on."

Hermione wasn't listening to her head of house she was trying hard to recall what the Headmaster had asked her yesterday at the end of the meeting.

----Flashback----

"Now, Miss Granger, Professor Snape has voluntarily offered to help you regain your memories, and hopefully put those nights events in your past. Are you willing to except his help?" asked the Headmaster in a firm and serious tone.

She gave the Headmaster a solemn nod in place of her answer.

----End Of Flashback----

"Umm Professor what time tonight did Professor Snape want me to meet him... and where?" Hermione asked, schooling herself not to panic and praying that she would stay clam as best she could. Against her will, her fears were starting to build up; at least what she thought was fear, and she started to feel nauseous.

"Professor Snape requested to see you after dinner in his classroom," replied the somewhat shell shocked Professor. She had imagined she would get some kind of emotion or reaction, not this dull echo of a voice.

"Well, then that is all for now. You are dismissed. You may head to breakfast now," said the Professor with a small sad smile. Shaking her head silently as she watched her 'daughter' figure walk away with heavy shoulder.

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"Hermione why aren't you eating?" Asked Ron with a mouthful of eggs.

Truthfully the smell and look of all the food was making her sick, plus the added fear of tonight did nothing for her appetite.

"I'm not hungry at the moment I'll get something from the kitchen later," and with that she was off to the bathrooms, the nauseous feeling intensifying.

As she dashed from the Great Hall, Ron and Harry were watching her flea, gaped like fish.

"S...Sh.She talked," stuttered Ron, a glint of hope in his eyes.

"Yea she did. I wonder why?" Harry mused out loud.

"Who cares why, I don't I'm just happy she talked," stated Ron going right back to his breakfast. "I was almost afraid she forgot how," he said with a small smile harry nodded in agreement just as there respective girlfriends joined them at the table.

The rest of the school day passed in a rush for Hermione, slipping in and out of dazes all day. Daydreams were not as harsh as facing reality of her life.

The teachers didn't questioned her, they left her alone to her private solitude, as she waited for, what was possibly, the most dreaded meeting of her life.

Dinner arrived at the same time like every night, yet for Hermione it came all too soon. The meeting with potential doom was to close for comfort, and she didn't want to think about what awaited her in the Snake pit.

"So Hermione how were your classes?" asked Ron.

Hermione gave him a look, and right away he new she wouldn't answer verbally. Hermione gave him a half-hearted so-so shrug and continued trying to eat. A shadow overhead brought her attention to the present and she looked up.

"Miss Granger, a moment of your time please," requested the aging Headmaster.

Hermione nodded in response, pushed her plate away and followed the Headmaster through the halls and into his office. Upon entering he motioned for her to sit; she did as was offered, and lowered herself tentatively into the large red love seat.

"Miss Granger, Hermione, I have some sad news for you today," the Headmaster stated holding an envelop in hand. "There was an attack last night on a muggle town," the Headmaster sighed deeply and continued, "Your parents were among the casualties," he continued quietly, looking solemn, "I'm sorry."

Hermione was in shock. Her parents, the only people she had left, were dead. Holding back tears she swiftly took the envelope from the ministry that the Headmaster had been handing to her and took off down the stairs. She started to run and then she just couldn't stop she ran, and ran. Never crying just running. As if to distance herself from the final blow of her life.

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When she finally tired herself out she headed back to the Gryffindor common room, where Harry and Ron were waiting for her. As she entered they rose from the couch, their words in jumbles.

"Are you okay?"

"Where have you been?"

"Professor Dumbledore told us!"

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"We're really sorry."

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Do you need anything?"

All out of breath, they paused and stared at her as if they had never before seen her. They went to hug her but she ran out the common room and in to the halls, flinch be damned.

As she left, Harry and Ron stood again staring at her back as she fled.

"Umm so...Yea" Ron started confusion filling his voice

"Yeah, lets go to bed." Harry finished not sure what was to be done.

"Lets," Ron agreed and the turned and walked up to the boys dormitories.

Hermione's run slowed to a jog and then to a walk, and when she finally took in her surroundings she was in the dungeon and standing in front of her potions classroom. Defeated and tired, she sunk to the ground mentally going over the day's events, when she suddenly realized that she never went to the meeting with Professor Snape and just as that thought came to mind footsteps could be heard heading her way.

Drained of energy, she shrunk as far as she could into the shadows of the dimly lit hall, which wasn't very much, in hopes that who ever was walking would miss her huddled in the corner, but they didn't.

"Miss Granger?" asked the silky voice of Professor Snape. Hermione looked up and nodded.

"What are you doing in the dungeons at this time? I should deduct points," as soon as he said that Hermione just broke down and sobbed. The potions master was taken back and stepped away from her as though she had a disease.

"Miss Granger, please come with me," said Professor Snape, but Hermione didn't move. This was the last thing he needed right now. He was never good with comforting people, and attempting to would drain the rest of what little energy he had left. Professor Snape sighed in annoyance and bent down to pick her up. To his shock she didn't flinch away from him, and instead snuggled in to him as she sobbed. Could his life get any more strange or stressed? He didn't thinking so.

He thought about carrying her to his private quarters, but shot that idea down as soon as it surfaced. Take an underage student that doesn't remember how you ruined her life into your private chambers. Great idea he thought to himself sarcastically.

Not wanting to complicate his night any further he carried her to the hospital wing, dumping her on the closest bed none to gently she woke instantly. Poppy came out right away. Severus went up to her and spoke in whispered tones, explaining what occurred while he was with her.

Then he headed to Dumbledore's office.

"Yes, Severus what is it?" The headmaster asked as Severus entered his office.

"Miss Granger seems to have found her way to the dungeons, in front of my classroom doors to be exact. She was very distressed." He spoke quietly "she never appeared for our meeting so imagine my surprise to find her barely conscious out side my class room.

"Hmmm" was all that could be heard from the Headmaster's side.

"Where is she now?" asked the Headmaster.

"She tired herself out while disturbing the peace of my dungeons with her sobbing, and is currently in the hospital ward being treated by Poppy," stated the potions master devoid of all emotions, except a hint of disdain.

"Well, I suggest we leave her there until morning and then we go down to inquire after her health and schedule another time to have you and her talk," stated the Headmaster with a touch of amusement.

"As you wish Albus" added Snape, slightly out of humor at the thought of that know-it-all witch taking up his mind "Good night," he added sarcastically, knowing it would mostly likely not be.

"Wait Severus you should no Miss. Granger lost her parents the night before to a Death Eater attack. Which I should have informed you of soon. I suspect that is the reason she missed your meeting, not out of spite." Said the headmaster watching his reaction closely.

Severus gave a very curt nod, jaw tight, and fist clenched. He rose swiftly and silently and was out the door in seconds.

"Good night Severus," he said as he watched the potion master walk away, he was in for another long night.

---------

Review me!


	5. Changes

Dawn came earlier than the Potion master wanted it to. He was dreading going to the hospital wing to meet with the Headmaster and Miss. Granger. He lay in his bed as long as he could afford to delay before he knew he had to get ready for the day.

After a shower and dressing he called for a house elf to bring his breakfast, normally he skipped breakfast but today he was trying to waste time. After eating he knew he could no longer postpone the meeting. He exited his personal quarters and swiftly walked toward the headmaster's office.

Arriving at the Headmaster's office Albus was already waiting for him.

"Shall we proceed Severus? Poppy just fire called me and it seems as though there is some disturbing news involving Miss. Granger's condition." Albus said his eyes once again lacking their normal twinkle.

Severus nodded curtly slightly worried about what the 'distressing' news would be.

-----

Arriving at the hospital wing Poppy seemed to be waiting for them. As soon as they entered she hurried them into her office and closed the door, adding a silencing charm. The Headmaster and Potion Professor exchanged uneasy glances.

"May I inquire after Miss. Granger?" Dumbledore asked

"Of course, I gave her a sleeping potion so she wouldn't become suspicious about my wanting to meet with you both in private." Poppy said with a frown

"What is the distressing situation with Miss. Granger's condition?" Asked Professor Snape

"There is no easy way to break this to you, Miss. Granger is pregnant." Poppy said watching Severus reaction. He looked as though he had been hit in the stomach, and then it was gone and he was back to his indifferent self.

"Indeed?" Asked the Headmaster

"Yes I've run numerous test on her, couldn't quiet believe that she could be with child, as smart as she is." Poppy said running a hand over her face showing her weariness.

"How far along?" Asked Severus if he was going to panic he wanted to make sure it was his.

"She is about a month along. The conception date conspires with the day of the incident." Poppy said with a grim face. "Meaning unless someone else had her that night you're the father of Miss. Granger's Child." Poppy said.

---------

Severus POV

Bloody fucking brilliant what next? Was Voldemort going to dance around in a dress? Of course this was a terrible development. I didn't want kids I don't like kids. But damn my honor if I would abandon my child.

I reached my quarters I entered straight away and went straight to the floo. I fire called Lucius Malfoy and told him if he didn't want to be hexed he'd come to Hogwarts right away. Lucius agreed.

Then I moved myself over to the brandy and poured my self-a nice stiff glass. Sitting down behind my personal desk, I gulped most of the Brandy down in one serving. Then I got up and grabbed to bottles before returning to my desk.

The floo opened suddenly and out Lucius came.

He glanced at my disheveled appearance; the bottles of brandy and the smug bastard raised his acrostic eyebrow at me.

"Oh shut it and sit the bloody hell down you poof" I growled I was in no mood for his games

"Why Sev, I do believe you invited me here. Why so unhappy?" He asked his tone bored but I knew him to well he was concerned.

"I'm going to be a daddy." I said and then downed another glass of brandy. The look on his face almost made me spit it out, but my mood was to foul.

"An explanation would be polite." He said back to his calm indifferent façade. I gave a cynical laugh.

"Well it seems my dear friend, that Halloween is a most magical night" I said my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"No" his mouth gapped "the Mudblood" I growled "I mean muggle born" I nodded and the cheeky bastard broke out into a large grin.

"I do believe congratulations are in order my dear friend." He said still smirking

"Oh go drop dead" I said and downed another glass of brandy.

"Normally once glass cover's a celebration." Lucius said

"Who's celebrating?" I asked raising an eyebrow

"Why ever not you're going to be a proud papa." He said smugly

"She's a damn student, I could bloody well be her father, she's not a pureblood" Lucius cut in "Really Severus resorting to nit picking?" He asked amused

"You know I don't care about blood I'm just frustrated." I said placing my head in my hands

"Well I can see that. Where is the proud mother to be? I'd like to congratulate her." Lucius said glancing around then looked at me.

"Oh my" he said, "She doesn't know does she. How very Slytherin of you." He said

"She's in the hospital ward, her parents were killed in a raid the night before. Anything to add to that?" I asked

"You mean was I there?" I nodded "no I was not, it was for new recruits. Draco wasn't there either. He's already an honorary member." He said his voice dripping with scorn.

"Why don't you just tell him you're a bloody spy for the light, you trust him right?" I asked

"No, Severus no I do not. He's too much like me at that age wanting to prove him to all those around him. I don't trust him because I can't be sure he wouldn't reveal my secret to further his own causes." Lucius finished a far away look in his eyes.

"No that is sad." I said

"No that is disgusting." He said " A man not able to trust his son. What is the world coming to?" He

Asked

"I have no idea but its only going to get worse with my offspring coming into the world." I laughed and Lucius chuckled.

"Its is going to be a long night my friend. Care to stay and 'celebrate'? I asked

"Celebrate what?" He asked

"Who the hell knows, who the hell cares." I said and poured him a drink.


	6. Bun in the Oven

The following morning Hermione awoke in the hospital wing still not quite sure why she was still a resident. Poppy had informed her when she awoke yesterday that Professor Snape had brought her to the hospital wing, after she had collapsed in front of him. Her memories were still blurry.

When she had awakened yesterday she was immediately checked over, given a full check up everything was fine until Poppy had brought the results back and began to read over them. Stopping suddenly in the middle. Hermione then had been given a sleeping potion that had kept her out until this morning. Maybe she had been given another, Hermione wasn't sure. She felt rested and calm. Finally she had caught up on the sleep that she had been deprived from the nightmares.

Suddenly Poppy came bustling out of her office, glancing up she found that Hermione was awake. A frown graced her face.

"Morning Miss. Granger" Poppy said

"Morning" Hermione spoke back

"How are you feeling today?" The nurse questioned

A shrug was her reply.

"Well let me floo the headmaster and tell him your awake. You've been excused from classes today." The nurse spoke as she went to her office and fire called the Headmaster.

Hermione sat and waited, she found no reason to try and ease drop on the conversation. There was nothing physically wrong with her; she was only here because she'd been having a hard time with things.

Moment's later Poppy came back out, calling for a house elf. She ordered a very bland breakfast for Hermione, which consisted of plain toast and tea with out sweetener.

Hermione had enough time to eat her breakfast in peace before the headmaster arrived. Hermione wasn't sure why but she had an off feeling about the headmaster visiting her especially, she hoped she wasn't in trouble.

"Ah… Miss Granger, it is good to see you up." The headmaster spoke as he walked to her bed. Hermione nodded as her only response.

Poppy came out upon hearing the headmaster's voice.

"Where's Severus?" She questioned

"I'm afraid he didn't take the news so well, but he should be her momentarily." The headmaster spoke his eyes twinkling with amusement. Seconds later the hospital wings doors were pushed open and Snape entered, his robes billowing in his wake.

He nodded curtly to all, but stayed silent. Looking as he always did, grumpy.

"Well Hermione yesterday during your check up we discovered some rather upsetting news. Poppy and I both felt it would be better told on a restful night sleep." The headmaster spoke.

Hermione nodded biting her lower lip slightly in worry.

"My dear girl there would be no easy way to say this, so I'll just be rather blunt. Your are pregnant." Poppy spoke swiftly

Hermione's eyes widened in shock, of all the things she had been expecting this was the last. She looked at Dumbledore he nodded his head as if confirming what Hermione had been told. She glanced at Professor Snape to find him coolly surveying her, the back at Poppy who seemed to be looking for any sign of hysteria.

"Hermione, it would seem the same incident that has been taking such a strain on your body has also given you a gift of sorts. Of course it is up to you and Severus what is to be done with the child. I understand that you are still in school, and that Severus is your teacher. I also understand that this was not something given willingly. It is however up to you to decide how to handle this situation." The headmaster spoke gently

"Miss Granger" Snape started formally

"I will abide by whatever choice you make. It is you that this event would effect the most. Whatever you decide I will except without question." He finished

She nodded still in shock. Pregnant. Snape. Were the only words going threw her mind.

"Hermione I understand you need time to process all that has happened. Most likely you would rather be alone, then surrounded by your fellow classmates. I have set a room up for you in between the Gryffindor house and the dungeons. You may invite whom ever you would wish, or you may keep to yourself. But no that wards have been set that if you try to harm yourself intentional or unintentionally Poppy, Severus and myself will be notified and sever action will be taken." The headmaster said his face expressed a humor while his voice was terribly serious.

The incredulous look that Hermione gave was seen by all.

"Miss Granger I am sure no one believes that you will harm yourself or your child, you are a strong willed individual. Regardless there have been strong ones then you whom have cracked under circumstances lighter than these." Professor Snape spoke

Hermione wasn't sure why but she got a warm feeling when Snape had told her she was strong. Though most likely it was not meant to be a compliment Hermione decided to take it as one. She nodded in understanding.

Poppy seeing as she wasn't going to go into hysteria anytime soon walked back towards her office, leaving the three in silence. She returned moments later with a stack of books for Hermione.

"Miss Granger, hear is some reading material for you to go over. It explains your choices, which are different from those in the muggle world. It explains all that you will go threw during your pregnancy. Wizard pregnancies are a little different than muggle ones." Poppy spoke as she set the books down on the nightstand beside Hermione's bed.

"I do believe that is mostly all that has to be said. Poppy and I will take our leave of you now. I'll leave Severus to take you to your rooms. I would also hope that you would set another time for you to discuss what happened that night. I will be informing your head of house of the current situation that has made its way to light." Dumbledore said

"I'll have a house elf take care of moving your things to your new suite and transfer the books I have given you. I don't want you to put more strain on your body then need be. Until you decided what you are going to do concerning your child I will have a house elf monitoring your eating and sleeping habits, so you don't inadvertently cause more damage." Poppy said with a small smile.

"More damage?" Hermione said her voice rough from the sobs from the night before.

"Oh I am sorry my dear, I meant to say that I've done the tests on you and your baby there was no damage but if you continue to not eat and hardly sleep it will effect your baby. It could result in a miscarriage." Poppy spoke

"Oh" Hermione said looking rather horrified.

"Well Miss Granger my door is always open if you need to talk. You are excused from classes until Poppy deems you healthy enough to attend." Said the headmaster

"Of course you will be able to get your homework assignments the same time as all the others in your class but there will not be a dead line." He added quickly once Hermione has gone pale at the thought of no classes to keep her busy.

With that the headmaster took his leave.

"Miss Granger feel free to come by if you are having any questions or concerns." Poppy spoke and gave Hermione a warm smile and turned away.

"Miss Granger I will wait for you outside of the hospital wing, while you get your self presentable." Professors Snape spoke and then turned swiftly on his heal and headed out the doors.

Authors Note:

Let me just tell you I have the worst trouble with beta. I get one and then they can't do it anymore. Men oh man lol. So if anyone is interested in being a beta, I have plenty of stories and chapters I need help with. Even if you can only do one chapter so something please. **This is me begging** lol. –on knees- Anyway if you have **anything** you really want to see in the story feel free to let me know. **Thank you for all the reviews. **I'll get into individual thanks next chapter. Oh but keep reviewing they help my motivation, Also this chapter hasn't been beta. SO sorry in advance for any errors.


	7. Chapter 7

So my beta didn't get back to me in time, and I have to go away so I'm going to post it anyway and then when I get the edited chapter I'll post that.

Life was never going to give her a brake. She decided as she shoved the books from her lap. Glancing once more at the white room she was in. Professor Snape had said it was up to her what she wanted the theme to be. The headmaster had kept everything white. She was clueless as to what to do. She'd never had to worry about such non-sense before.

She was still having the hardest time accepting that there was a life in side her, A life that her and her professor had created. Willingly or not the life was an innocent and shouldn't be punished for the actions of a madman like the Dark lord. But Snape a father was words she'd never hoped to hear. Still not knowing all the events of that night made figuring out things a little bit difficult. She'd never really had much of an opinion or abortion. Never thinking that she'd enter in to a situation that would lead to that process of thought. But thinking about it made her sick. Now matter what lay ahead for her, even though there were much darker times ahead, she couldn't thing of giving this child up and having an abortion, technically that solved one of her dilemma's. Now only 199 more to go. What was she going to tell Ron and harry?

Ron. She wasn't supposed to be having Snape's baby she was suppose to be having Ron's. After years of skirting around their feeling for each other, Ron had simply let go. She wasn't sure why everyone had been shocked at first mostly her. But then he began to date lavender and he became happy, surprisingly happy. There friendship wasn't hurt they both pretend that there was nothing to pretend about. In the end she'd let her feelings for Ron go, well as much as one could. She understood that for them there wasn't going to be any happy ending, especially not with the latest developments in her life. Ron would never want damaged goods, no one would. That answered the question of her love life. She wouldn't have one. Who would hire an unwed mother? In the muggle word it didn't matter if you were married or not. But in the wizarding world you were marked a scarlet woman, someone easy enough to sleep with but not good enough to wed. So either she'd go live as a muggle and forget about the wizarding world, or she'd have to beg professor Dumbledore to help her. The muggle world was looking more appealing to her as each second passed the only problem being she could never forget about the wizarding world, short of someone casting a powerful memory charm on her. She'd have t0 think more on that problem later. Money and her future were going to be the biggest problems of all. She didn't have her parents any more, she doubted Snape had enough money to support all three of them. He was only working on a teacher's salary, and lived at the school. She didn't want to live at the school the rest of her life. Even though the school held some of her most precious memories. It was also filled with heartbreak and pain.

Sighing she got up and began transfiguring the colors of the room. Focusing very hard on not focusing on anything but that. It was tiring. But at the end she had finished her whole "mini apartment". The common room was stone wall but the color was sand like to keep it neutral. The floor was a plush dark green, the couches and chairs were a mixture of different greens to keep it standing out from the floor. The room itself was a rather odd octagon shape. The bath room walls were a pretty pastel green and the floor was a marble texture but the color was a striking white. The bath and shower were a darker green with swirls of lighter shades of green and white. The room itself was a standard square shape. But it was larger than she would ever need. The bedroom was an uncommon size. It seemed to be larger than the bath and common room combined. The bed was king size with four posters and a larger walk in closet. Again the floor was a green carpet and the walls a pastel Ivory. The bed a dark wooden frame and there was a nightstand but other than that the room was bare it made the bed overbearing. The sheets were black and dark greens.

She had an idea the reason for the big quarters. She knew it was a little bit of an apology as to all she'd been threw this year. She understood and was grateful.

Looking around her room she realized the room could have been made by a slytherin with all the green in it. Deciding she'd always liked green but being in Gryffindor had never been aloud to express it.

Looking at her watch she decided it was time for bed. She took her time getting ready, showering and brushing her teeth knowing there would be no classes f0r her tomorrow. Laying down she began to think again. About the walk from the hospital wing, she'd been putting it off all day.

She'd shrunk the books that Pomfery had given her, placing them in her pocket. Gathering her wits she'd met Snape in the hall. They walked away from the other towers closer to the great hall, but not two close. The door itself, well there wasn't really a door per say but a wall and a picture. The picture was of Fawks. Never noticing that particular one before she figured it was brought just for her. Feeling a little special she smiled slightly to her self. Suddenly Snape turned to her.

"Pick a password miss granger." He said with a scowl

"Umm..mm" She replied not knowing what to say, she hated being put on the spot.

"Forgiveness" She said saying the first thing that came to mind. The word made Snape drawl back as though he'd been cursed. The life human size painting of Fawks moved and Snape lead the way in to a totally white "mini apartment".

"The head master wished to keep it plane so you could change it how you'd like." Snape said looking around in distaste.

"Oh…. I…How nice of him" She said mostly to herself, and earned herself a small smile from Snape.

"I shall take my leave. The fireplace is connected to all the teachers do not hesitate to call if you are in need." He said sounding very un-Snape like. Then he turned to go and was almost out the door when he stopped and looked at me. His eyes were filled with some unknown emotion, like a silent plea.

"Miss. Granger" He began then paused as though he was at a loss

"Though you may not know the events that lead up to now but know that I would have never chosen this for you, or any other. But most of all you, you were chosen for a reason. That reason was to hurt the side of the light, you were and still are a great asset to our side. Don't lose faith in yourself, because no one has or will ever lose faith in you. I apologize for all the damage I've done." He said she stood there shocked. He made to leave, she stopped him, by gently touching his arm, and he flinched then turned towards her.

"Professor you don't have to apologize. You were more a pawn in this than I was. There's nothing I can forgive. You only need to forgive yourself. An your right I don't know all that happened I do know that you didn't do it by choice, and your willing to help me get over it. I'd like that if you're still willing." She said with a strength she really didn't have.

"Yes, Miss granger…" He looked as though he wanted to say more but didn't.

"Yes, we'll speak more of this later. Goodnight." He said and turned to leave.

I did notice that he didn't look so sour when he left. When he doesn't have that scowl he's not that bad.

She mentally slapped herself. She needed sleep. Shutting her eyes she slowly drifted off letting the worries that had plagued her all day float away.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning boredom set in, fast. Having read threw half of the books from Madam Pomfery last night, and already decorated her room's options of what to do, to occupy her, were running thin.

She knew that she had to be strong. She had already forgiven Snape, though she didn't know the details, she understood that it was not his fault. She had to be strong. She could do this. It was not problem, she told herself. Her parents had always called her independent. Now she would find out if they had been right or not.

Life wasn't going to be sunshine and daisies from now on. It was going to get tougher and she needed to get stronger. There were dark times ahead with no reprieves in sight. She understood that the dark lord would stop at nothing to damage the side of the light. By allowing her to be damaged or weakened she aloud him to win. By allowing him to win she was falling Harry, and the memory of her family. She knew there were casualties of war, but she hadn't really thought that her life would be personally touched. She had to accept that Ron and she were never going to be anything but friends. Though it hurts she would have to accept it once and for all and get on with life. Yea right she told herself. If acceptance was as easy as saying it, there wouldn't be self help books.

She needed to set up a meeting with professor Snape.

Deciding to make the first step and contact him first she went to her desk and grabbed a spare sheet of parchment. Sitting down she began to write, trying to convey the most respectful tone that she had.

Dear Snape….no not respectful enough

Dear Professor…sound like we're having an affair

_Professor Snape,_

_I know that you are an extremely busy man, but I was hoping that you might spare sometime, while I am relieved from classes, to help me gather more information about the events of Halloween. _

_Please reply at your earliest convinces._

_Respectfully,_

_Hermione Granger._

Hermione looked it over once, then twice, and then decided that she should send it right away so that she didn't try and over analysis her letter. It was simple and straight to the point. Anyway he had already agreed to help her. Though she was rather sure that the Headmaster had urged him to help her, either way she was rather grateful.

Quickly she called bibby.

"Yes Miss Hermione" the little elf squeaked

"Take this letter to Professor Snape" Hermione said

The little elf nodded and left.

God how she hated using a house elf, but she couldn't afford to send an owl because if for some reason the letter got intercepted then there would be hell to pay. Plus a walk up the stairs to the owlery didn't sound very appealing at the moment. She might have been bored but she wasn't bursting with enough energy to take a hike.

She hoped that Professor Snape would respond to her letter quickly. For some reason she was dying to see him. Maybe it was because he held the answers about that Halloween night that was gone but not forgotten.

She was debating weather or not that she should tell him that she decided o keep the baby. He would know eventually she thought to herself. It wasn't like she could keep it a secret forever. But she couldn't help but wonder if he would be hurt that she didn't tell him herself. She was going to tell him and that was final. He deserved to know he is the baby's father. Even if he didn't want there child she was going to keep it.

Of course she didn't know weather or not he wanted to be apart of there child's life. She hadn't had much time to talk to him about that sort of topic. That was why she needs to set up a meeting with him, at his earliest convenience. That way she wouldn't be pushing him into a corner, hopefully he wouldn't lash out at her like a caged tiger.

The rest of the day seemed to drag on. With the occasional drop in of bibby, asking her if she was hungry. Telling her Snape had yet to reply but she had given him the letter personally. She hadn't heard back from Professor Snape. Not that she thought he would drop everything and come running to her but that didn't seem to matter no matter how many times she reminded herself that Snape wasn't at her beck and call the longer the day went. She hoped he wasn't avoiding the letter.

By the time dinner time would have ended in the great hall Hermione was close to ripping her hair out and climbing up the walls. She wasn't sure what bothered her more, the fact that she wanted to hear from Snape, not just about the events of Halloween either. Or the fact that she upset that he hadn't written yet, what could he be doing. He couldn't be that busy. Oh Merlin she was acting, nay thinking like a girlfriend or a wife. That was the last straw she thought. She wasn't right.

Maybe it was a side effect of the pregnancy. She hadn't really read anything about it, but she wasn't done with all the books yet. Maybe madam Pomfery had a potion for her deranged thoughts. Potions, Snape made most of the potions, Snape hadn't written her back.

She had to focus on something else. She had to tell Harry and Ron. Maybe she should do that soon. That way she would be distracted. Yes, tonight is the night she thought to herself. She was going to have to tell Harry and Ron, and hope that they will still speak to me.

"Bibby" She called

"Miss wants Bibby?" Bibby said appearing

"Yes can you please go get Harry Potter and Ron Weasely for me?" She asked

"Yes miss, Bibby will get them for you." Bibby said and disappeared

Hermione sighed to herself. At first she had thought telling them right now would be a brilliant idea. They used to be so close. But after her withdrawal from life she wasn't sure how they would take it. Maybe she thought that that they would be so happy to her up and about again that they wouldn't be to upset at the rest of what she had to tell them.

Hermione jumped out of her musing when a knock sounded at her door. Getting up from the couch, which Hermione had planted her on earlier and, went to the door. Opening it, it revealed Harry and Ron, for once without there signification others. Both the boys had eager looks on there faces but at the same time there was a look of doubt.

"Hermione" The both said and then looked at each other and grinned, then they looked back at her.

"Harry, Ron its good to see you both." She said a little on the hesitant side, she decided against giving them hugs, not quite sure she was ready for the physical touch.

"Come on in" she said standing back and letting them pass by her.

"Wow this place is bloody amazing, a little to Slytherin but amazing" Ron said staring around the room. Harry nodded in agreement.

"Thanks, come on sit down" Hermione said motioning to the couches they sat and then looked at her expectantly.

She cleared her throat nervously.

"So what's up Hermione" Ron asked

"Not that there should be anything up" Harry added a little to quickly elbowing Ron in the stomach

"Well you see it's kinda like this" she said standing up and began pacing

"On Halloween when I disappeared, you remember that right" Hermione paused looking at them "of course you do" she said not really waiting for an answer.

"Well I was taken to a revel with the death eaters, as a toy for them" Hermione said quietly glancing at Ron and Harry. Both there faces had become grim

"What kind of toy?" Harry growled low in his throat

"Umm well.." Hermione began to stutter

"What did they do to you, Hermione?" Ron asked his anger apparent

"I don't know the details of what happened, they placed a memory charm on me" Hermione said

"Who the death eaters?" Ron asked Harry growled as Ron spoke

"No the headmaster, I was in such shock that I had a hard time understanding what was happening." Hermione said

"There must be someone who knows what happened!" Harry said with determination

"Snape" Ron said jumping slightly

"Yea what about Snape was he there?" Harry asked

"Yes he was" she answered hesitantly avoiding there eyes.

That caught both there attentions

"Hermione…" Harry said in warning

"I told you I don't know the details, at least not yet. I do know that Snape was the only man involved when it came to me" Hermione said sighing a little because the next part was going to be extremely hard.

The boys picked up on her sigh right away.

"What else happened" Ron asked

She didn't say a word and looked away from them

"I'm pregnant" She said quietly

A full 5 minutes of silence descended on them she was ready to demand that they yell at her. She couldn't take the silence wear are her hot blooded friends who act first and possibly ask questions later. Did she really not know them anymore, had they grown this far apart.

"You're what?" Ron asked

"I said I am pregnant" Hermione said this time a little louder, laced with a slight annoyance. She looked at Harry he was just sitting there watch her, an unreadable expression on his face.

"Who's the father" Harry asked suddenly

He knew she thought Harry figured it out, Ron was still trying to comprehend that she was having a baby, but sat forward when Harry threw his question out.

"The father is uh Snape" she said quietly then braced herself for there reactions.

Both just sat there silently.

"Guys say something" Hermione said

"It was rape wasn't it?" Harry asked sitting on the sofa his arms crossed over his chest

"Oh come off it Harry of course it was, why would she want him" Ron said with a dramatic hand gesture

"Now wait a minute" she started coming to Snapes defense

Both boys turned to look at her

"Now I know it was rape but I also know that Professor Snape" Ron blanched "saved my life. I also know that he's the father of my baby. Where as it could have been Lucius Malfoy or any other death eater there. So you may not like the situation, well I have to live it and get on with it everyday. So don't insult Professor Snape, he saved my life wear any other death eater would have killed me when the entertainment was done." Hermione spoke with conviction.

The three of them just sat there, staring off into space, wondering how they had let there relationship derivate to this. True Harry and Ron had been busy but there was no excuse not to help. She had been there friend from day one, and as soon as they had gotten there girlfriends they let what they had with Hermione slip away.

"Hermione I think I speak for both of us when we are glad to see you up and about, I am sorry that we haven't been there for you the past few months, having to deal with this alone. I can except the fact that there's nothing I can do to change the past, but what I am having a hard time dealing with is that Snape is the father of your child" Harry said and Ron nodded in agreement.

"I understand" Hermione said nodding slightly tears coming to her eyes

"What Harry said is true but that doesn't mean that we're going to stop being friends with you. Nothing could stop that" Ron said with a smile

The rest of the night was them catching up on new happenings, till it was hours past curfew.

It was nice to have them with her again. They left with the promise that they would come by to see her again tomorrow.

Sitting back on her bed she sighed. She had hoped that this would be the way that it went. Relief was washing over her, when suddenly a crack sounded and a house elf appeared.

"Miss Master Snape is wanting me to give this to you" it said holding out the letter.

Hermione too it gratefully

"Thank you" she said with a slight nod the elf was gone. Opening the letter quickly see read,

_Miss Granger,_

_I have received your letter and am replying to inform you that we shall meet the day after tomorrow, in your rooms, after classes._

_Professor Snape_

He had responded back, if she hadn't been so tired from her hours with Harry and Ron she would have jumped up in delight. She didn't want to worry about what that meeting was going to be like; rather she went to bed with thoughts of Snape in her head, and a smile on her face. Slowly she drifted off into dream land.


	9. Short chapter and I'm Sorry

The next day she didn't wake until afternoon, she slept so well. She thought it had something to do with the fact that Harry and Ron were still her friends, and she had a meeting with Snape after classes.

Excitement filled her veins as she sat up and headed towards the bathroom, there was no real reason to be excited, professor Snape was only going to tell her about Halloween, and she really shouldn't be excited about that. But at the same time she was excited to see him. She'd missed his sarcasm and his brilliance in the class room. She couldn't wait to be back to her classes, but at the same time she had a feeling that she was going to have to drop some subjects. Potions, as much as she hated to admit it, the fumes probably wouldn't be good for her unborn baby. Maybe she could ask the headmaster to modify some of her classes so she was still ready for her Newts, but didn't injure herself or her baby. She'd have to hold off on her apparitions test till after the baby was born. Though she wasn't in a terrible hurry she was quite accustomed to floo travel.

Being unwed and pregnant was going to cause some problems. Maybe she could speak with the headmaster about becoming an apprentice to one of the teachers. That way it would occupy her need for learning and give her an income with a place for her and the baby to stay. Maybe she could intern with her head of house, she'd always loved transfiguration.

There were so many things that she had to deal with, and so many unanswered questions. She knew she would forget something she decided making a list would be best for all involved.

_Things to do before the baby are born:_

_Ask about modifying her classes_

_Talk to Dumbledore about possible apprenticeship (Prof.__ McGonagall__, Prof. Vector)_

_Find possible places to live (if unable to apprentice at Hogwarts)_

_Look for possible jobs (if unable to get a job at Hogwarts)_

_Ask Mr. Weasley about possible jobs at the ministry_

_Gather a list of what will be needed for the baby_

_Look for possible names for the baby_

_Visit her parents house, pack up there belongings_

Well it was a start she'd just have to keep adding to it as thoughts occurred to her.

The day passed slowly, her visit with Ron and Harry went by smoothly with little awkward pauses in there conversation. They stayed right up until curfew, she helped them with there homework, it felt like old times. They'd each given her a hug and left saying they would back tomorrow.

"Well stop by tomorrow after class okay Hermione?" Harry said

"Umm could you come later on in the evening, a little after dinner maybe?" Hermione had asked the boys had looked confused

"Why?" Harry and Ron asked glancing at each other.

"Well you see" Hermione cleared her throat a little "Professor Snape is coming to meet with me after his last class" she finished

The boys nodded leaving an awkward silence fill the room. Reminding them that they had all changed and grown apart, no matter how much they wished they were still the same.

Hermione showered and got ready for bed. Thought of the last few months filled her head not allowing her to drift of until early morning.

Okay so I'm sorry its taken so long for me to put up the latest two chapters I hit a little writers block. I'm also sorry that my spelling and such has been so bad, as "come on" said. I don't have a beta anymore and I just so wanted to get these to short chapters out so I can get on to when Snape and Hermione talk.

Anyway please let me know if your still reading this. I know its been a while.

Thanks


	10. Emotional BreakThrew

Hermione didn't wake until late the next afternoon, her thoughts having kept her up until the early morning hours. She stretched lazily reaching over towards her nightstand where her watch lay glancing at the time she almost had a heart attack. It was 2:20 pm Professors last class was with Gryffindor and ended at 3 o'clock. If he came straight here that gave her only about 35 minutes to get ready, forty at the most. Professor Snape didn't seem the type to procrastinate when it came to important matters.

Practically jumping out of bed she rushed to the bathroom to shower. Though she'd taken on last night before she went to bed, she'd forgone her normal hair spell and now her hair rivaled a rat's nest. Hermione thought about doing a quick cleaning spell, but she herself never particularly like the results compared to an old fashioned shower.

Clearing the fog from the bathroom mirror with her hand she started silently at herself still not sure who she was really seeing. She felt as though all the missing events of the last few months had changed her and she just wasn't herself anymore.

Putting on a little makeup just to cover up the paleness of her features she preformed the knot free spell on her hair and added some witches weekly special witch's gel that she'd gotten from Ginny last Christmas. She'd rarely used it, choosing to forgo it instead. Not that it hadn't been a great gift, since she had been constantly complaining about her hair. But she hadn't had the energy or motivation to the past few months.

Rushing from the bathroom she did a quick glance throw of her closest realizing she had practically nothing to wear that was comfortable, appropriate for this meeting? Glancing at her watch as she secured it firmly around her wrist she saw it was just about 3 that meant she had less than 10 minutes to get dressed and make sure everything looked alright. Grabbing a sweat suit she had gotten from her parents two Christmas's ago she dressed quickly.

The sweat suit was a nice navy blue color, the fabric for the pants was velvety, and she'd always loved the feel of that. She decided not to wear the matching jacket; instead she put on a light blue short sleeve top that worked well with the color of her pants. Though the shirt was a little tight she thought it added class to her sloppy choice of pants.

Glancing at the mirror before leaving her room she did a quick once over, she wasn't sure why, but she wanted to make sure she looked good, with out noticeably going out of her way. Hair, check, clothes, check, makeup check with on last glance to her watch she headed out to her common room and started to readjust the books from Poppy. Not wanting them to be sprayed about the coffee table when Professor Snape arrived.

Glancing at her watch once more she realized that Professor Snape would be arriving any minute. She sat down on the couch, glad she had chosen such a comfortable one when designing her room. Taking a claming breath she tried to clear her mind, so she didn't become to overwhelm at the thought of the discussion she and Snape would be having just minutes from now. Breathe Hermione she silently said to herself.

A knock at the portrait door brought Hermione out of the claming state and into a panic. She hadn't thought this threw well enough the man that she'd been terrified of the last few months was going to be in her domain in a few short seconds, the man that had raped her under imperus curse due to Voldemort and his death eaters.

Though she said she'd forgiven him, she meant it more for his sake than her own. Trauma like that didn't cure itself over night. She knew it would be a long while before she could honestly forgiven him fully, if ever. But they were going to have a child together and she wouldn't blame the child, and she had to get over this. This was the first step. She silently got up from the couch and walked towards the door, every step becoming harder than the last. Finally arriving at the door, she breathed a silent breath of relief that she hadn't died in the process of walking to answer the door.

She gently pushed open the door, revealing Professor Snape, his face an icy mask of indifference. She almost turned and ran right then, fearing she would throw up whatever was left in her stomach from the night before. But she didn't she stood still and gave a small smile when Professor Snape focused on her making her flush under his inspecting eyes, causing him to raise an amused eyebrow in question.

Calm down Hermione she said silently to herself once again.

Take a deep breath

"Hello Professor, would you like to come in?" She said stepping back leaving the door way free for him to pass threw. He nodded and stepped threw the door, taking a swift look around her accommodations. Thought he had seen them when he escorted her here after the hospital wing, he'd yet to see them decorated. By the small almost unnoticeable nod he gave when he glanced her way she felt his approval, which caused a warm feeling to flood her tummy, weather it was her reaction or the babies to his words of approval she didn't have time to think on it, just yet.

"Would you please sit down?" she asked wondering where she got the courage to actually have a polite conversation with this man.

He nodded and sat in the chair closest to the door. She took a seat on the large couch on the right side which was closest to her bed room. It seemed they both were rather weary about this meeting, wanting to stay close to an exit in case this meeting went bad.

"Thank you for agreeing to this meeting Professor, and your timely answer" She said rather awkwardly searching for something to say.

She had, when she had first written to him, plenty to say, but now her mind was all a blank. She felt like a failure, she had invited him here but at the moment couldn't think of the reasons she felt the need to invite him into her 'home'.

"To be honest Miss. Granger I wasn't expecting a letter from you quite so soon, or at all for that matter" Snape said in his silky draw that caused shivers to go down her spine, but not all in an all unpleasant way.

"I thought maybe we should talk" Hermione said wringing her hands together in her lap.

"Yes I think we should also" Snape said

"Would you like some tea? I can call Bibby. Are you hungry? It will only tak…" Hermione started to say but was cut off by a sharp interruption from her professor

"Miss. Granger will you please stop with the polite chit-chat, regardless of what you had to say during our last brief talk I feel I should inform you that there is no way you have forgiven me, nor have I forgiven myself. If you honestly believe that then I hesitate to think the true intelligence of our spawn." He spoke in a cruel voice

Hermione reared back as though she had been slapped. Tears began to fill her eyes. That bastard.

"If all you are going to is sit and cry allow me to call Potter and Weasley to accommodate your childish behavior I honestly thought too much of you not to realize that this was a pity party for yourself." Professor Snape said each word cutting down the defenses that Hermione used to keep her anger a bay, tears still streaming down her cheeks.

"If you will excuse me, call me when you gain some intelligence and maturity." Snape finished rising from his chair and heading towards the door cloak billowing as dramatically as always.

Just as he began to step out the door Hermione spoke.

"Sit down you greasy bastered RIGHT NOW." she spoke in a deadly calm voice, all her defenses gone. Her words had the desired effect; Snape stopped turned raised an arrogant eyebrow as though he was doing her a favor by staying and listening to her speaks.

"By all mean please continue Miss. Granger" he said sitting down looking bored.

Her anger kept building with each movement from him.

"Where the hell do you get off? I was just trying to be polite, have a civil conversation! You're a miserable bastered! You raped me you sick son of a bitch! How dare you sit there and act like I'm begging for your time or your doing me a favor. We can talk now or we can talk in court, I'm sure the ministry would have no problem trying a known death eater." She said each word rising in volume.

"You probably liked it, the first time you've gotten some in a long while, but then your such a miserable bastered you probably like forcing girls, school girls why else would you stay here at Hogwarts were your hated, despised, god your not even worth the air you breath." She said standing up and pacing.

"God no one wants or trusts you! How does it feel to know if you died tomorrow no one would care? YOU RAPED ME! YOU TOOK AWAY THE ONLY THINK I HAD LEFT TO GIVE. YOU RUINED ME! I'M PREGNANT WITH YOUR EVIL SPAWN! YOU'RE A GODDAMN POTIONS MASTER HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW TO GIVE ME A DAMNED POTION TO PREVENT PREGNACY! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU DUMBLEDORE AND POPPY THINKING!" Hermione was yelling so bad that she was huffing and puffing

Snape just sat there watching her, his eyes dark.

"THEN AGAIN YOU PROBABLY SAID YOU GAVE ME A POTION BUT DIDN'T BECAUSE YOU KNEW THIS WAS THE ONLY CHANCE YOU'D EVER GET AT HAVING A BABY! KNOWONE WOULD TOUCH YOU; YOUR HAIR IS SO DAMN GREASY! WHY! WHY! WHY! WHY! WHY! HOW ARE YOU NOT DEAD! SOMEONE SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOU! YOU'RE WORTHLESS!! I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU, AND I HATE YOU, YOU BASTARD!" Hermione yelled falling to the floor due to lack of energy.

"I HATE you, you utter bastard" Hermione finished falling from a yell to a broken whisper, wrapping her arms around herself rocking back and forth sobbing into her hands.

Snape stood up wordlessly, though it wouldn't of mattered Hermione was sobbing so loud you wouldn't hear a centaur stampede. Snape walked to the door and opened it. Stepping back gently as he let the Headmaster, the Gryffindor head of house and Poppy into Hermione's quarters.

Poppy and Minerva walked over to Hermione quickly gathering her in there arms and headed to her rooms there faces filled with pain for what had happened to this bright young girl.

Albus walked up to Snape placing a hand on his shoulder speaking softly as they both watched Poppy and Minerva enter Hermione's room with her sobs still filling the room.

"I'm sorry you had to do this my boy" Dumbledore said comfortingly

Snape shook of his hand

"If you are no longer in need of me headmaster I would like to return to my lab" Snape said his voice masking any and all pain.

Dumbledore stepped back and nodded

"Of course my boy, go get some rest" Albus finished the sobbing from Hermione's room still going strong.

Snape nodded and left.

Dumbledore sat down in the chair the Potions Master had previously filled and placed his head in his hands feeling older than he had ever felt before.

- - ------

Severus headed towards his private rooms fully intent on drinking himself unconscious muttering the password he stepped in, stopping at the sight of an uninvited guest in his chambers.

"Here you go old friend" the man said handing Snape a glass of brandy before sitting himself down once again while waiting for Snape to get comfortable.

The silence filled the room, which Snape was thankful for, preferring silence over Miss. Grangers sobs any day.

"You did what had to be done, she would have kept it bottled up inside, harming herself and the baby. No one faults you for what you did" the man said

"I know Lucius I know but it still doesn't help me in the long run" Snape said with a weary sigh.


	11. Poppy

The next morning when Hermione woke up she felt as though Hagrid was sitting on her head. Rubbing her hands over she felt her eyes that seemed to be swollen. What had happened yesterday? What was the last thing she remembered?

Opening the door for Snape

Making small talk with Snape

Snape cutting her down

Snape walking to the door

Her completely flipping out on Snape

Oh dear Merlin had she actually yelled at Snape? And the things she said, she was so embarrassed. How was she supposed to face everyone after breaking down like that? Now they'd never get along he was definitely going to hate her! Great. Things couldn't get any better for her at the moment.

A knock at her door saved Hermione from wallowing too much over her embarrassment from yesterday.

"Come in" she said lifting her head slightly and then quickly setting it back down when it began to pound once more.

Please don't be Snape she prayed

Whew it wasn't she thought to herself.

It was Poppy. Which left the question how and why was Poppy here. And where was Snape? How did she make it to her bed when the last thing she remembered was yelling at Snape louder than she'd ever yelled at anyone before in her life?

"Hello Miss. Granger how are you feeling today?" Poppy said as she walked to the room and began fussing around Hermione's bed.

"Umm I'm okay, not to be rude but why are you here and how did you get in my room?" Hermione asked eyes closed trying to block out the pain from her head.

"Miss. Granger, my dear we've been here since your emotional break threw with Severus" Poppy said and then handed her a potion bottle.

"There you go dear drink up it's for your headache" Poppy said and once again began to fuss over her doing scans and making sure she was healthy as was the baby.

"Emotional breakthrough? And who's we?" Hermione asked after she swallowed the headache potion.

"We being, Dumbledore, Minerva and myself, emotional break through? Well you see it wasn't healthy how you were holding all your feelings in and you don't even know the full events of that night when your child was conceved. Yesterdays breakthrough could have been much, much worse had it happened later on in your pregnancy, and it also could have harmed the baby." Poppy said pulling up a chair beside Hermione's bed.

"I'm sure you read it in those books I lent you, but stress can do a strong number on an unborn baby. If Severus would have began to tell you all the events of that night you would have kept them bottled inside until you finally burst which probably would have involved wild magic that ends up draining you of your magic for a period of time. And your baby feeds of your magic to develop its own. If you had set off wild magic you could have made your child a squid." Poppy said gently as she watched Hermione's eyes grow bigger and bigger.

"I didn't know that, none of the books said anything about that happening" Hermione said

"Of course they don't my dear they never do. Most pregnancies are planned and there is little stress in the mother to bee's life. So there would be no reason to make it common knowledge, nothing to add to there child birthing worries." Poppy said with a gentle smile.

"So Professor Snape wasn't just being cruel?" She asked

"No child I went to the Headmaster with my concern for you and your child should you not deal adequately with all that's happened to you and he called Minerva in and we all sat down and had a discussion. We decided anger was the best course because no other emotion can make you really release what you're bottling up like anger can. I hope you forgive us we all just wanted what was best for you." Poppy said searching Hermione's face for a signs of anger or distress

"I understand, I guess but how did Professor Snape get pulled into this since he wasn't in the original meeting of the minds?" Hermione asked sitting up gently now that her headache had passed.

"We were trying to think of someone whom could cause you anger, not hurt. So that rules out all the Weasley's, Dumbledore, Minerva, and I it had to be someone whom you weren't that strongly connected to. We considered one of the Malfoy's but then Snape came to Dumbledore with your request wanting Dumbledore's advice. We all met and explained everything to him and though he was reluctant to do so he finally agreed. Though by what we heard from the hallway he didn't have to say much just a few choice words" Poppy said with an amused smile.

"I remember I must have had a lot of pent up thoughts towards Professor Snape and the whole situation. You were right though I most likely would have kept it all bottled up, and I would have eventually come to blame the baby." Hermione said sadness filling her face as she thought of blaming an innocent child.

"Now dear don't get down, it could and would happen to anyone in your position. But now we've taken the first steps to preventing anything like that from happening." Poppy said with a smile.

"I suppose I should write Professor Snape and tell him I'm sorry for all that I said" Hermione said musing aloud

"Now Hermione don't do anything that will build up aggression or upset you, you said those things because they needed to be said. Right now you have known reason to apologize for anything. In fact you should honestly be upset with me, Albus and Minerva because we never even considered giving you a potion to prevent the pregnancy, like you mentioned when you were speaking with Severus. We were just so shocked by the events that we let our brains get away from us. I know Dumbledore is taking this terribly, he prides himself on thinking everything threw and being all knowing and for this to happen, knocks his confidence down, which I can't say is a bad thing every once and a while." Poppy said

Hermione smiled not exactly sure how to respond.

"Well my dear why don't you go take a shower and get freshened up I'll call Bibby and have her get you some breakfast. Would you like me to contact Mr. Potter and Mr. Weasley for you? I can tell them to come by in a few hours. Would you like that?" Poppy asked patting Hermione's had gently while standing up

"That would be nice Poppy can you tell them to come over in a few hours I'd like to have a nice long soak in the tub and some light breakfast first." She said with a small smile while moving out of bed and to her closet to pick out what she was going to wear today.

"Of course dear take as long as you need" Poppy said

"if you need anything Bibby can find me in seconds" Poppy said as she left Hermione's chambers.

"Thank you" Hermione called out wanting Poppy to hear

------

Hermione decided on very casual today, all she wanted to do was lie around and not be serious about anything. She still felt extremely worn out from yesterdays 'fire works' show between her and Professor Snape.

She decided on grey sweat pants with a baggy quittach t-shirt that she had gotten from Ron one Christmas, it might not have been fashionable but it sure was comfy. She headed to the bath room to have a nice soak.

Nothing could relax her more, Hermione spent close to an hour in the hot tub relaxing and thinking of nothing. By the time she got out she was pruney but that was fine she didn't plan on anyone caring about what she looked like she had no one to impress. She decided to skip the hair treatment and just throw it up into a messy bun. Slipping her gray sweat pants and ugly t-shirt from Ron on she went to find the extremely comfy socks she had received from Molly for her birthday. They were so comfortable they should be illegal.

Bibby had set up a small table and chair with a plat of toast and cup of tea under on of the elf's warming spells. That was just what her stomach wanted something with substance but not to heavy. She still felt a little out of order from last night. After finishing her meal and calling Bibby to tell her she was done and didn't need anything else at the moment.

Hermione walked over to the couch plopping herself down she noticed that the book Poppy had given her were all replaced with knew ones for her to read. She wasn't sure what time Harry and Ron were actually going to show up so she grabbed a book entitled 'So I'm going to be a mother before I take my Newts' which sounded right up her alley and began to read.

Hermione must have drifted off because she awake to the sound of a knock on her portrait door. Glancing around she noticed it was still light outside so she hadn't slept the day away and she'd never checked the time earlier so she didn't know how long she'd been out.

Figuring it was Harry and Ron she walked over to the door rubbing her suddenly stiff neck from her sleep position and began to open the door.

"You guys sure took your ti…."Hermione trailed off in shock as she saw that it wasn't Harry or Ron but someone she never would have expected in a million years.

It was Voldemort's second in command,

Lucius Malfoy


	12. Lucius Malfoy

OKAY so I know I suck at life. I'm horrible at grammar and I make a lot of mistakes. I would gladly take any help anyone wants to offer. So please excuse all my mistakes. It's hard finding a beta when I plan to update as often as possible which could be like every day if I have my way. So thank you for all your reviews and understand that I am trying to fix my grammar mistakes so just bare with me please. Keep up the reviews please there like my fuel for writing. It's pretty neat. Bye for now

_**Come On:**__ I'll say it again I suck at grammar I do have Microsoft word but it can't do everything an person can._

_**Sapphireeyes55557:**__ I'm glad you like it please continue leaving me reviews lol. I know I suck at grammar I'm working on finding someone._

_**Not Written**__: I can't tell if the first part of your review was meant as sarcasm or sincerity. But the last part of you review is nice. Either way thank you very much for reading Have a wonderful day_

_**Samphdoria:**__ I love your reviews. I love the length of them please keep them up._

_Also thanks to __**Mrs.HermioneSeverusSNape**__**Psycho Demon-witch**__**TCFellows**_

_Thank you all for your reviews there what make me keep writing_ after a hard day when I'd rather sit around I read the reviews and get motivated. So please keep them up. Have a wonderful day

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To say she was shocked would have been the understatement of the century; she was also a little scared, what Malfoy Sr. was doing here. Who let him in the castle don't the have wards against this kind of thing.

The sound of Mr. Malfoy's cane tapping on the open portrait door brought Hermione's attention back to him

"Miss. Granger if I may have a word" Malfoy said with a raising an eye brow in a silent question.

"O…Of course sir" Hermione said though she may not have liked him, actually she hated him, but she wasn't stupid. She was alone in her rooms, how he'd found them was a question that would have to be answered, with no witnesses. Lucius Malfoy was a very dangerous man, and she had a child growing in her.

"Would you be so polite as to invite me inside? I'd hate to air our dirty laundry in the hall way as the muggles say" Malfoy said with a small non threatening smile.

Still in shock of the weird events that seemed to keep happening to her she stepped back letting him in. Knowing that if he really wanted to get in her rooms there would be no stopping him. Considering her wand was on her nightstand in her bed room far away from here.

"May I sit down Miss. Granger, or do you normally begin conversations standing like peasants" Malfoy inquired in amusement

"Of course sir" Hermione said also sitting down on the far end of the couch

"Obviously you don't like being in my presence, well I can understand that I don't like being in yours. Your manners are terrible; something your parents should have taught you, some one should have a word with them?" Malfoy said with a small smirk

Tears began to cloud Hermione's vision, anger began filling her veins.

"But alas I digress I simply wanted to make it clear that under no circumstance will you be getting rid of this child, nor will you try for sole custody of him or her." Malfoy spoke in a light tone, as though talking about the weather.

Hermione felt as though she'd been blind sided

"You see Severus told me of your talk yesterday, or should I say disagreement. How you spoke of taking the child, and accusing him of rape. While the circumstances may be correct you will do know such thing, do I make myself clear" Malfoy asked his voice dropping to a velvety soft tone

"what right do you have to tell me what I can and can't do" Hermione said angry that he was here in her home, that he had spoken of her parents, like he didn't know they were dead. That he was speaking as though he had the right to tell her what to do with her child.

"Ah the mud blood finally shows some spirit, how interesting, but you see I am giving myself the right as a friend" seeing her look of disagreement he added "not your friend you foolish girl, Severus's friend, and to think they call you the brightest witch of our time" Lucius said mockingly

Hermione flinched slightly at the insults

"Severus is an honorable man so honorable that if you decided to get rid of the child or give up the child or even try for sole custody he wouldn't fight you, because he is honorable and would feel terrible due to the events of the conception. But understand this my dear, I am in know way as honorable as he and I will fight you till the end to make sure Severus has rights to his child. Do. You. Understand?" Malfoy asked with deadly softness.

Hermione nodded not sure exactly how to respond.

"Good then I believe we are done here, do have a good day Miss. Granger" Malfoy said inclining his head slightly in parting and walking to the door.

"Why do you care" Hermione blurted out without thinking

Malfoy stopped his can resting on the door

"I care because I am a true friend of your professors and I know what his inner most desire is and I will do anything, destroy anyone to make sure it is fulfilled. The Dark Lord himself can not stop me from my quest" Malfoy said with an air of dignity

"What's Professor Snape's inner desire" Hermione asked after taking in Mr. Malfoy's answer

"That my dear is for you to find out, but no that I am watching and will know if you do not heed my words, again miss granger do have a good day your looking rather pale" Malfoy said as he was exiting her rooms.

Hermione sat in shock. That had to be the weirdest conversation she had ever been involved in. she sat feeling rather threatened, and partly scared.

"Bibby" she called

A pop signaled Bibby's arrival

"Bibby could you please find Professor Dumbledore and ask him to come to my rooms right away please" she said standing up and walking to her chambers not waiting for a reply the only acknowledgement she heard was a pop signaling Bibby leaving.

She went straight to her nightstand a grabbed her wand, never wanting to be without it again.

A knock on her door signaled the headmaster's arrival.

She walked quickly to the door, opening it she made a silent gesture with her hands inviting the headmaster in, and asking him to take a seat.

After they were settled Bibby brought tea.

"Hello miss granger you look rather shaken is everything alright" Dumbledore asked

"I just had a visit from Lucius Malfoy" Hermione said in a rather dazed tone watching the headmaster's reaction. See shock and confusion made her feel slightly better about the event.

"May I ask what was said" the headmaster asked sitting forward in concern

"He told me that I would keep the child and not try to get rid of it nor would I try for sole custody" Hermione said thinking over what had been said watching as a realization came over the headmasters face

"I see my dear and you're worried about your safety?" the headmaster asked

Hermione nodded slightly

"Well I do admit that it is slightly troublesome that Lucius was able to find your rooms, but then again he has always been rather resourceful, even as a student. But my dear I do not think you have anything to fear from him." Dumbledore said

"How can you say that after all he's done to us, giving Ginny the diary he's a death eater, why should I not fear for the safety of myself and child" Hermione asked her tone rising slightly

"My dear calm down you have nothing to fear because Lucius Malfoy is one of our own" Dumbledore said enjoying the temporary look of confusion and then dawning on her face.

"Really, how come that's not known, we know about professor Snape" Hermione asked

"Professor Snape has always been in the inner circle of Voldemort's court but Lucius Malfoy is Voldemort's confidant and has been for some time. Lucius has been in our serves since before Draco was born. But since he is the highest level of Voldemort follower, that information couldn't be given to anyone. In fact you are on of four people whom actually know of Lucius true loyalty. I only tell you so you don't stress yourself with worry" Dumbledore said

"Why did he come to the side of the light?" Hermione asked

"That my dear Hermione is not my story to tell. But know that Lucius only came here today to see you because he cares for Severus greatly the have been close friends forever. Sadly threatening is how he shows that he cares. He would never harm you or your child because he would bring Severus wrath upon him and Lucius above all others knows exactly what Severus is capable of." Dumbledore said

Hermione nodded

"though just to ease your mind some more Minerva and I will place extra wards and pictures around to make sure no danger befalls you." Dumbledore said with a patient smile

"Thank you sir" Hermione said

"my dear don't thank me, it is the least I can do, now if you don't mind I left Minerva in my office and if I leave for to long she tends to tidy up my mess, which leaves me at a loss of were to find the items I need" Dumbledore said standing up and walking towards the door.

"Thank you professor Dumbledore" Hermione said with a smile

"Oh professor, before you leave do you know what professor Snape's deepest desire is" Hermione asked sudden remembering the ending of her conversation with Mr. Malfoy

Dumbledore looked startled for a moment before responding

"I do my dear, but I am afraid I can not speak it for it is not my desire to share, you will have to ask professor Snape" Dumbledore said

Hermione nodded in understanding she had thought that but had wanted to ask anyway

"Oh and miss granger I ran into Mr. Potter and Mr. Weasley on my way here and told them to come see you at a later time" Dumbledore said as he walked out the door

Hermione stayed seated until Harry and Ron showed up thinking about the strangeness of her day.


	13. Lots of talking

Thank you all once again for your wonderful reviews, I'll go into more detail in my next chapter. Please keep the reviews coming. I'm not sure If I will be updating for the next few days I have a 3page essay due and I work the next to night but hopefully wed. of Friday there should be something new up. Thanks

Once again, I know that I suck at grammar.

Review me please!

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This had to be the weirdest day of her life Hermione thought as she went to her door to allow Harry and Ron access to her rooms.

As she looked at them they were bursting with excitement like little kids about to play in a ball pit.

"Hermione" they said together stepping forward to each give her a hug, making her smile.

"Hi guys" Hermione said after they'd parted from there hugs

"How have you been? Nothing's wrong right, when Professor Dumbledore stopped us on our way over here we were a little worried that something might have been wrong" Harry said with Ron nodding in agreement.

"No nothing's wrong, well I guess something could be wrong. I got a visit from Lucius Malfoy" Hermione said noticing how each boy became instantly on edge at the name. Harry hand was hovering over the pocket where his wand was stored and Ron was glancing around as thought Malfoy was going to pop out at any moment.

"What did he want" Harry said his voice bordering on dangerous

"That's kind of a complicated question" Hermione answered

The questions of why showed strongly on each of the boys faces as they looked at her.

"You see Malfoy only stopped by because of my "conversation with professor Snape the night before" Hermione said

"What happened during your talk with Snape" Ron asked

"I sort of verbally attacked professor Snape" Hermione said her face getting red as she looked any where but at the boys

"You verbally attacked Snape and you still alive?" Harry asked while Ron looked on in wonder

"Yes, and I feel terrible but they wanted me to. Because I was bottling up my emotions towards him and the baby so I may have said a few choice words something like 'I'll have you arrested for rape and take sole custody of the child' which he then conveyed to Malfoy causing him to act on Professor Snape's behave. Saying that he would never allow me to fully take the child away from Snape" Hermione said somewhat in a daze of remembering the conversation.

"what a bloody bastard if you want to take your kid and keep him away from Snape's slimy influences then good for you, don't worry about that snake Malfoy" Ron said slamming his hand down lightly on his leg in outrage

"Ron" Harry said in a warning

"Despite what the events that happened, which we still don't know do you Mione" he asked with a quick glance and with Hermione's negative nod he continued

"A child deserves both his parents" Harry sad with a sad look in his eyes as he thought of the fact neither of his parents were living Hermione gave his hand a small squeeze

"Yea but Snape's a right bloody bastard" Ron said jumping up and pacing like a chicken

"He's treated us like crap since the first day, Hermione he's torn you down because of your smart" Ron said

"I know that Ron" Hermione said

"But that still doesn't mean I can keep a child that's half his away from him. But at the same time that doesn't mean that I'm going to allow him to treat his child like he treated us" Hermione said with a look of contemplation

"I don't think this subject is something that Ron or I can really give advice about" Harry said thoughtfully

"Ron and my opinions are bias because of everything that's happened to us involving Snape. But in the end it's gonna be your call because you're living the situation and were just outsiders looking in on your situation." Harry said

Hermione nodded in understanding

"As much as I just want to say forget Snape, I can see Harry's point about our opinions." Ron said sullenly.

"Thank you Ron for that mature comment, how about we just skip the Professor Snape topic for now" Hermione said watching both boys nod there head in agreement.

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"You wanted to see me headmaster" Professor Snape said as he walked into the Headmaster's office.

"Yes my boy I did" The Headmaster said motioning to a chair with his hand, watching as Snape was seated.

"You see my boy I was asked quite urgently by Miss. Granger's elf to come see her earlier today. When I arrived there it would seem as though she had a somewhat unexpected visit from a dear friend of yours, Lucius Malfoy." Headmaster Dumbledore said watching a tension slowly filled Severus body.

"Did Miss. Granger happen to say what his visit was in regards to" Snape asked with a clenched jaw

"Yes, Severus she did she said that Lucius seemed to be under the impression that she might try to keep the child away from you, or charge you with rape" the headmaster said solemnly

"I apologize, headmaster I spoke with Lucius yesterday after my talk with Miss. Granger and relayed to him what had been said in anger; I fear he took what was said out of context. Is Miss. Granger okay?" Severus asked

"Yes she's fine after I assured her that Lucius only threatened her on your behalf. I will be adding more wards to Miss. Grangers rooms seeing as Lucius found them, meaning that anyone could. I did have to tell her about Lucius being a spy, to keep her from worrying. You may want to inform him of that given the opportunity." Dumbledore said with a small smile

"I will apologize to Miss. Granger when I see her next. Possibly I may go tonight to make sure she is well" Professor Snape said

"Oh my boy I wouldn't do that, you see she has young mister Potter and Weasley over right now and I do believe they will be there for sometime. Perhaps its best to wait for another day, maybe tonight you can have a talk with your friend regarding overstepping the boundaries of ones friendship and upsetting young mothers to be" the headmaster said with a serious expression

"Of course Albus" Severus said

Dumbledore nodded

"If that is all" Severus said standing and heading for the door. Before walking threw the headmaster spoke one more time.

"Severus would you like a lemon drop" He said humor filling his voice.

A door slamming shut was the headmasters answer.

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A noise from the fireplace signaled his guest's arrival.

"Severus what on earth is so important that you had demand to see me right away" Lucius said as he walked elegantly towards his good friend Severus and seated himself in the chair across from where Snape himself was planted.

"Lucius the headmaster and I just had a very informative talk where I learned a great deal of going's on behind my back. Would you like to take a guess as to what I learned" Severus asked

Lucius knew what Severus was saying, if he confessed now then Severus would easily forget and move on, if he didn't well he could still feel the answer in his back from the last time he decided to draw it out.

"If you are referring to the visit I paid to Miss. Granger's rooms? Well that was just a friendly chat, my friend." Lucius said lightly

"A friendly chat that she saw fit to call for the headmaster once you left. What happened to be said in this so called 'friendly chat' Lucius" Severus said before taking a sip of his brandy he'd conjured himself.

"I simply told her that I would not allow her to keep you from your child. That I would go threw anything and anyone to make sure your desires are met. Is that so wrong, for me to do that for a friend" Lucius asked innocently

"When ones friend does it no there is know harm, when you do it there is too much harm. What possessed you to go and visit Miss. Granger and for that matter, how did you find her rooms, there warded unless invited." Severus said in exasperation.

"Severus I'm hurt, you think I did more harm than good, well I will admit I did purposely make a remark about her parents, I didn't want her to think I'm nice" Lucius said causing Severus to snort

"I don't think that will ever be a problem" Severus said

"As I was saying I decided to let her know that I would make sure you got the proper rights to your child, which I still intend to secure, with or without the Malfoy money."

"Lucius you know that I have more than enough money too..." Severus was saying as he was cut off by Lucius

"I know you do and I also know that you refuse to touch your money due to the fact you still feel guilty about your parents deaths" Lucius said

"You forget old friend I've known you forever so do not try to hide the true statements behind your lies" Lucius said in a serious tone

Severus nodded knowing he was right

"Now as I was once again saying I did it to help you, you know as well as I do that if that Granger girl came here tomorrow and said I don't want you in the babies life, you wouldn't fight her because you fell guilty. You would stay an outsider on your own child's life, while it slowly killed you" Lucius said

Severus stared in deep thought at the fire

"So berate me all you want, hex me if you must but in the end I was doing it for you. As I told Miss. Granger know one will keep me from making sure your deepest desires are made reality, not even you" Lucius finished

A long silence stretched out over the occupants of the room. Just as Lucius thought that nothing would be said a voice broke the silence spell.

"Thank you my friend, thank you" Severus said his voice rough with emotion

"Always my friend always" Lucius said both drifting into there own thoughts


	14. Meeting with Dumbledore

_Miss Granger,_

_There are some items that need to be discussed. I shall drop by around noon. If it is not convenient please send Bibby with an alternate time to meet._

_Albus Dumbledore_

The note was the first thing Hermione saw as she awoke from a surprisingly restful night. She also wondered what exactly the headmaster wanted to speak about since they had just spoken yesterday, but she'd find out soon enough. Looking at her watch she saw it was quarter to 11 so that meant she had enough time to get a shower and maybe try and stomach some toast.

After her shower she walked into her common room and saw Bibby had already brought her some plain toast kept warm under a heating charm. Though she didn't like the slavery of a house elf they were amazing and deserved so much credit.

Last night Harry and Ron had stayed long past curfew and had hidden under Harry's invisibility blanket, so not to get caught, and headed for the Gryffindor tower. They had a wonderful time just sitting and talking like they had done before erased memories, girl friends and such had come in the way. Hermione was almost able to imagine she wasn't pregnant with her Professor's child, and Lucius Malfoy hadn't visited her, and she wasn't behind in all her class, but instead ahead as she had always been. It had been a relaxing night to say the least.

With about a minute till noon a knock came at her door. Hermione moved from her place at her breakfast table, which disappeared when not in use, thanks to Bibby and headed for her common room door.

The sight that greeted her was as expected the headmaster.

"Hello Miss. Granger" Dumbledore said as he took Hermione's silent invitation into her rooms.

"Hello Professor Dumbledore, you note was rather unexpected, seeing as we just spoke yesterday." Hermione said as she made herself comfortable on her couch and Dumbledore on the chair.

"Yes my girl I can understand that, but I must admit yesterdays visit from Mr. Malfoy was enough to even throw me off balance for a time. So I completely forgot about what I had wanted to bring up with you the next time I saw you do forgive an old man for his stumbling" Dumbledore said with a twinkle bright in his eyes

"Of course headmaster it's no problem" Hermione said

"What I wanted to speak with you about is your classes. Sadly I don't feel we should put you back into regular classes with the students I fear that if Voldemort was to learn of the child there would be problems so I have spoken with each of your professors and they have agreed to tutor you in your class." Dumbledore said

"Tutor me sir? Does that mean I will not be getting my full education?" Hermione asked sounding very much like the 'old' Hermione.

"No my dear, but you must understand that as the pregnancy progresses you will not be able to spend as much time studying. You will need your rest. The teachers have agreed to teach you all the information you will need to pass your NEWTS, anything else you pick up will be your decision. Think of it as advanced placement." Dumbledore said

Hermione understood what he was saying; all of the pregnancy books she had read had hinted or indicated that further on in her pregnancy she was going to need more rest. At least she would still have all the knowledge she would need to pass her NEWTS, she could always read in her spare time.

"I understand headmaster" Hermione said with a small smile, though she would miss her regular classes with her friends she had to do what would be best for the baby and herself.

"Good, good child that's what I like to hear you will have the same schedule you had before we pulled you out. Sadly you will not have class everyday, just because we have to accommodate the teachers as well as yourself. I have a room prepared for the lessons, just because I don't want more people knowing where your room is than necessary." Dumbledore said

Hermione nodded in agreement.

"Sometime tomorrow a door will show up right over there" he said pointing to a place near the fire place.

"It will only allow you to go down and you to come up, know one else, for your safety." Dumbledore said

Hermione nodded liking that idea.

"Now onto a more touchy subject Professor Snape has agreed to tutor you in potions if you agree, if not I will teach them to you myself. There will be know hard feelings if you do not feel comfortable with Professor Snape teaching you" Dumbledore said

Hermione didn't know how she felt about that the indecision must have shown on her face because Dumbledore said something.

"My dear under no circumstances do you have to come up with a decision today. Your class will not begin until next week and it is only Tuesday. Do not fret child, take your time and make the right decision." Dumbledore said

Hermione nodded knowing she needed to think about having Snape as her Professor.

"Well my dear girl I feel as though I should let you think things over. Feel free to call upon me threw Bibby when you reach your decision." Dumbledore said while standing up and walking towards the door.

"Good bye headmaster; thank you for coming" Hermione said as she watched the headmaster left her rooms, and listened as the portrait door shut.

Hermione wasn't sure what to think, she wasn't sure if she was ready to face Professor Snape again.

Though she knew they had a lot of issues they had to cover that didn't pertain to her NEWTS testing. Having him tutor her might help her to become more comfortable around him, which would definitely help in the grand scheme of things.

She just wasn't sure if she could handle it, the last time they had talked, she exploded on him about every little pent of thing. Though she still did feel bad about that, she wasn't sorry she said it, it had to be said.

She stood up and went to grab a sheet of paper and a pen, when she didn't have to she preferred using muggle writing units over wizarding. She decided to make a pro's and con's list about him teaching her.

_**Pro's-**_

She'd get to know him,

She'd see what kind of man he was,

If he'd make a good father,

She wouldn't be so uncomfortable around him,

It would help in the long run of her child's life if they could get along

If he wanted children

Maybe she could find out his deepest desire that everyone seems to know but her

_**Con's-**_

She'd be embarrassed,

She'd be uncomfortable

He could turn out to be a git

Well if she went solely on her list then he'd be her teacher. But she didn't want to make a knee jerk reaction so she'd have to sleep on it.


	15. A little something

I was doing so good with updating! Well I'm back though I'm not sure when I'll be able to update again. Hopefully Soon! Thank You so much for all your REVIEWS there what made me want to write this chapter. I'm sorry about the shortness of this chapter, I just wanted to get something out so you didn't forget about my story lol!

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She wished she'd been able to sleep on it. Hermione was up most of the night coming up with more PROS and CONS for her list about Professor Snape. She was no where closer to an answer than she was when Professor Dumbledore first brought it up to her. 

She didn't know who to talk to about such a problem. Harry and Ron would be bias, her head of house and Poppy would be supportive to a point but Hermione believed that there opinion would also be bias towards not trying to get to know her babies father.

Normally she would go to her parents or Mrs. Weasely but since her parents were gone and Mrs. Weasely didn't know what had been going on with her. It seemed as though she was going to have to make the decision on her own. 

Hermione sat down on the couch and promised herself she would not get up until she had an answer.

Three hours later Hermione still didn't have an answer. But she had started to count the cracks in the castle walls. 

She needed someone's opinion it was killing her not being able to talk out her problems. 

She didn't know who to ask. She kept mentally going down a list of people but none of them would do. 

She didn't know who to ask unless…..

Hermione turned and started out her common room door towards her destination without even realizing that this was one of the first times she had left her common room.

Hermione didn't even notice what exactly she was doing until after her hand had knocked on the door. 

She stood there momentarily as it downed on her she'd com unannounced

About to turn and run

That idea was smashed when the door opened and she starred into black eyes, looking questioningly at her.

"Miss. Granger" The silky voice drawled looking down at her

"Professor Snape…." She said quietly looking down at her feet


	16. We are finally getting somewhere

Okay so this is the new chapter and were finally getting somewhere with the SnapeHermione relationship, there acting like friends!! YAY Thank you for all the reviews on that pitiful chapter I posted the other day. Read and Review!! Please there like air to me lol.

"Um sir I was hoping I could talk to you?" Hermione mumbled starring at the ground pointedly.

Professor Snape did not answer and Hermione did not look up. The silence stretched on between them and Hermione began to wish that a black hole would come and suck her up.

With the silence still stretching on, she felt that he was going to deny her request she began to speak,

"Um I should just go." Hermione muttered quickly and turned to walk back towards her room, still never looking at her Professor.

"Miss. Granger have I given you any indication that you were not welcome to speak with me?" Professor Snape drawled out his voice filled with amusement

His words made her stop her cowardly retreat towards her room, and turn back to face him.

"Well Miss Granger, have I given you any reason to think you were not welcomed here?" Professor Snape questioned his signature smirk tugging at his lips.

"No sir, you didn't," Hermione answered glancing at him quickly and then focusing on the floor once again.

"Then Miss Granger, won't you come in?" Professor Snape asked his hand moving in a sweeping direction his robes making the motion more dramatic making her smile slightly.

Hermione stepped hesitantly in to the potions room. Looking around briefly assured her that all was still the same since the last time she had had class in there.

Professor Snape closed the potions room door causing her to jump slightly at the noise.

"Would you prefer to talk in here, or in my chambers?" Professor Snape wondered aloud from directly behind Hermione.

Hermione flinched slightly at the closeness of his voice before answering,

"Where would there be more privacy for what I have to say?" Hermione spoke her voice quivering slightly at the thought of being alone with him on unfamiliar turf.

"We would have total privacy in my chambers; they are warded against anyone outside of them intent on listening," Professor Snape replied still standing directly behind Hermione.

"Okay then we should speak in there," Hermione said quietly.

"As you wish," Professor Snape uttered as he moved from behind her and towards a door Hermione had always thought was a storage room.

"Come Miss Granger, if you still wish to speak?" Professor Snape said in a slightly questioning voice.

Hermione nodded to him and began to follow her Professor into his chambers.

Once Hermione stepped into Professor Snape's rooms, she glanced around slightly realizing the room was a common room of sorts and not a bedroom.

She noticing the color scheme of the room was dark, seated in the corner was a large office desk, the room was large, and there were two sofas one loveseat and two chairs.

Along the wall was a door towards the far end of the room and a small cabinet with brandy glasses across from the seating area, she noticed without over analyzing the room in detail due to the butterflies swarming in her belly threatening to burst out.

"Please sit Miss Granger," Snape said using his hand to motion to her choice of seating.

Hermione seated herself on a large chair that molded around her body comfortable, she felt as though she never had to move again, and that would be okay with her, she thought with a sigh.

"Miss Granger to what do I owe your unannounced visit to?" Professor Snape asked as he began to fix himself a drink of brandy from the cabinet.

"I was hoping to have a moment of your time if you weren't busy," Hermione answered.

"If I had been busy I would not have let you into my chambers," Professor Snape retorted.

Hermione nodded slightly to herself.

"I'll ask again what you deemed so important that we had to speak with no prior appointment or warning of your visit," Snape asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I was hoping to speak with you about you tutoring me in potions, as the Headmaster informed me of yesterday," Hermione answered

"What of it?" her Professor questioned his voice showing mild annoyance

"I was hoping to get your opinion on it" She answered her voice quivering

"What about my opinion did you need to know?" Snape said his lip curling in mild disgust.

"I was just wondering if you were okay with tutoring me." Hermione questioned.

"Miss Granger I am a professional, able to push aside any feelings or concern that I may be experiencing. Are you questioning my ability to teach you or are you just questioning my intelligence?" Snape questioned his voice sounding in a heated whisper.

"No, I would never question anything of the sort," Hermione said rapidly her face showing her indignant expression.

"Really, then what were you really asking?" Professor Snape asked before gulping down the remaining brandy in his glass.

Hermione sat in shock not understanding why his words questions came out so heated.

"Well Miss Granger?" Professor Snape goaded his eyes lit with fire.

"I…I." Hermione stuttered her face flushing with embarrassment.

"Yes Miss Granger?" Snape questioned his eyebrow rising in amusement at her flushed appearance.

"I'm not sure what I'm asking you I don't know why I'm here I don't know why I choose to come talk with you but I do know I am here and I choose you so I would appreciate you treating me with respect," Hermione said rising her voice her hand rubbing her lower belly in comfort.

Snape's eyes flickered down to the area on her body her hand was rubbing.

"Finally Miss granger understand that I have no problem talking with you about whatever you choose, in an adult manner. Nevertheless, I will not baby you when we speak, nor will I listen to your unthought-of ramblings. You will speak clearly and strongly, no frightened child routine or we will sit in silence until you gather your thoughts," Snape said his voice filled with exasperation.

Hermione nodded her head in understanding.

"I know that you do not remember the events that have lead to our current situation. However, I do I live with them everyday; until you understand the events there is no reason to fear me. I acknowledge that you are uncomfortable with me that would be natural due to your subconscious feeling of something you cannot remember. But we will in the coming times have to interact with each other for the sake of our child." Snape stated in a neutral voice.

"I understand Sir," Hermione spoke in agreement of his words.

Snape nodded

"And thank you," Hermione said meeting his eyes briefly before looking down.

"For what dare I ask Miss Granger?" Professor Snape questioned his voice holding an undertone of confusion.

"For being you, sir, before I came to speak with you I was a stressful mess whom couldn't make a decision to save her life. Everything was just over whelming me, you're like a book on organization spelled out to speak the words," Hermione said with a small smile.

"A book you say Miss Granger?" Snape said tilting his empty glass to the side while starring at it as if it held all of life's answers.

"I hope you don't take offense it's just that no matter what other feelings I may exhibit towards you, you seem to be able to stop me from having a melt down," Hermione answered with another small smile.

"Melt down Miss Granger I wasn't aware the human body could melt with out a spell?" Professor Snape said.

"Oh well not an actual melt do..." Hermione started to answer but died off when she saw his face.

"Did you mean that as a joke?" She asked in shock.

"I have been known on the rare occasion to draw a punch line, its part of my charm." Snape said with a strait face.

Hermione began to giggle childishly.

Snape let out a small chuckle while watching her enjoyment.

"I've decided to agree to you teaching me. Despite what at times I may feel it would be better for both of us to co-exist," Hermione spoke as she began to calm down.

"I agree," Snape, answered

"Oh my, I should get going," Hermione said glancing at her watch and began to stand up, as did Professor Snape.

"I understand, do come again Miss Granger, may I suggest a little notice upon arrival of your next visit?" Snape said his voice sarcastic.

"Was that another attempt at humor Professor Snape?" Hermione asked as she followed him out of his chambers and back into the potions classroom.

"Yes, Miss Granger I believe it was," Snape said as he opened the potions door that led into the castles hallway.

"You should try the humor route more often, you can pull a good punch line," Hermione said standing in the potions doorway.

Snape smiled slightly before nodding a farewell watching as Hermione began to walk up the Dungeon stairs to the castles main floor.

"Oh and Miss Granger?" Snape said causing Hermione to turn around questioningly.

"Tell anyone about my since of humor, and I'll make you beg for death," Snape said with a smirk before he closed the classroom's door.

Hermione stood in confusion for a moment before realizing that he had not been serious, but instead it was his sarcastic humor once again.

Hermione giggled to herself quietly as she made her way quietly to her rooms.

Neither had seen the menacing eyes watching her from the hallway outside the Potions classroom.


	17. Chapter 17

Okay I'm really really sorry about my lack of updates. The good news is that I have already written the next 6 chapters for this story. I've found me beta, well actually she found me but anyway this is a repost of the chapter after my beta edited it. Please review….

Let the story Continue:

She decided to start off the morning with a letter to Arthur Weasley hoping to get a head start on the job search. Hermione was rather sure that Dumbledore would have told the Order about her condition, if not the Weasley's for sure.

_Dear Mr. Weasley,_

_How are you and Mrs. Weasley doing? Rather well I hope. I am writing to inquire about any future job openings that may appear in the coming months. I don't have a preference I just need something stable. It would mean a lot if you could keep your eyes and ears open. Give Mrs. Weasley my best please._

_Sincerely,_

_Hermione Granger_

She glanced over the letter with an annoyed sigh, she had hoped to add context to the letter but she didn't know where to begin. Though the Weasley's had always been like family to her, she wasn't sure how they had taken to the news of her condition. Hopefully they didn't blame her. But until she knew for sure she didn't want to get to friendly incase her relationship with them turned ugly.

She also knew that her condition was not safe to be put on paper. She'd have to wait for the holidays to really know how everyone in the Order was taking the news.

Thinking about her situation brought Professor Snape clear above the rest of her thoughts. She couldn't help but wondered exactly how much Snape would want to be involved in their baby's life. Would he want to be an "everyday father" or would he be content to be a "few days a week father" or even a "holiday father".

It was definitely something that they had to discus before the baby was born but they had time. She didn't want to rush pushing answers. Not wanting to face his wrath before knowing him a little better and what set him off, since he was known to have a temper.

Though she had to admit that Snape had seemed rather nice the night before last when she had shown up at the potions room without notice or invitation

Hermione was bored, it wasn't that her room wasn't nice it was just that it was just that she wasn't used to not having to go to her classes.

Classes had always been her life ever since she had gotten into Hogwarts. She'd always wanted to excel at her classes and be known for her grades and not for her blood. She'd wanted to prove that a muggleborn could succeed and surpass a pureblooded witch or wizard.

For her, her private lessons couldn't start soon enough.

Though she had only recently found that she was with child and her normal everyday life was ruined she didn't in the least hold any resentment towards her baby.

She stood up from her desk and headed to the owl that had made its new home in her rooms, thanks to the Headmaster.

The headmaster had given her one of the school owls to keep her lines of communication open towards the later months of her pregnancy.

She'd been thankful for that not wanting to go out now let alone towards the end of her pregnancy.

She tied Mr. Weasley's letter to the owl's leg, and petted in gently before whispering;

"Take that to Mr. Weasley at the Ministry and know one else" before turning around and heading back over to the desk wanting to set up a meeting with her head of house to see about an apprenticeship after the baby was born.

It wasn't that she was scared to leave Hogwarts it was just that Hogwarts felt like home to her and since her parents had died it made Hogwarts the only home she had left.

Thinking about her parents brought fresh tears to her eyes. Hermione took calming breaths trying not to upset herself or the baby.

She knew that she would have to grieve for them eventually, but she wasn't in a hurry because grieving meant accepting that they were gone, and she wasn't ready for that.

Jotting down a quick letter to Professor McGonagall she called Bibby.

"Please deliver this to Professor McGonagall for me" Hermione said as soon as Bibby appeared.

Bibby nodded and left with a snap.

She decided that now would be a good time for a nice nap. It wasn't that she had done a lot today but she could already feel the weight of a growing body inside of her.

Also with all the thoughts of her future fresh in her mind it wore her out to think about what was to come. She'd always had this amazingly successful plan for her life. She knew that most of it was still possible, but at the same time a lot of it wasn't.

She'd planned to work her way to the top of the ministry by working long hours and forgoing dating until she was happy with where she was. Now those long nights and lack of personal connection seemed undoable with a baby on the way.

Though she supposed that she could hire a nanny or see if Professor Snape would look after there baby. But then did she really want to miss all the baby's firsts? She would only get to have one first born did she really want to be a stranger to her baby?

Hermione found herself getting excited at the prospect of having a baby, if not a little scared for going in alone. She'd never really planned on children anytime soon, or if at all but just the idea of a life growing in her made her giddy enough to forget all of her problems.

She had only meant to rest her eyes for a few moments but when she finally awoke she saw that it was evening and she saw a letter on her coffee table.

She sat up and reached for it and began reading.

_Miss Granger,_

_I received your request for a meeting and will arrive tonight at 7 pm sharp. If this is an inconvenience in anyway please don't hesitate to reply, if the time is acceptable than no reply is necessary and I will see you at seven._

_Professor McGonagall_

_She _couldn't help but wonder if her head of house had always been this straight laced. Though she knew that nobody loved her students as much as Professor McGonagall she also knew that it was very rare that she showed it.

Glancing at the watch she had dug out of her closet late last night she saw that the time was quart till seven.

Hermione jumped up and headed towards the bathroom wanting to make sure that she was presentable, and also because she needed to pee quite badly.

Hermione fixed her hair back into a bun and brushed her teeth quickly before heading out to her common room to wait for her Professor to arrive for there meeting.

A knock sounded firmly on her portrait's door frame promptly at seven pm. She moved from her comfy place on the couch to let her professor in.

"Miss Granger" Her head of House said in greeting as she stepped into her rooms.

"Professor thank you so much for coming so quickly" She said as she motioned to the couch.

"Not at all my dear, what can I do for you?" Minerva asked.

"Before we get to that would you like any tea? I can have Bibby make some up." Hermione offered trying to be a good host.

She'd never had to entertain someone in the Gryffindor common room before mostly because there was so much happening and so many people that it was easier to let people entertain them.

"No thank you dear I only just finished my dinner" Minerva said with a smile.

She nodded in understanding of her Professor decision before taking a deep breath and jumping in to the reason she had requested her Professor's presence.

"Professor," She started but was cut off by McGonagall

"When we are in private please call my Minerva it's less formal" Minerva said with a smile.

Hermione nodded before beginning again.

"Minerva" Hermione said testing the name on her tongue, though it was a little uncomfortable to call her Head of House by her first name, she new that she would just have to adjust.

"I was wondering if there would be any way to look into me becoming an apprentice after I take my NEWTS" She said slowly.

Minerva took a few moments to reply, looking deep in thought while silence filled the room.

"I do believe that, that is a wonderful idea that I will bring up to Albus the next time I speak with him" Minerva said with a smile.

Hermione smiled also happy that her idea wasn't shot down right away.

"If I may ask Hermione why do you want to become an apprentice?" Minerva asked gently.

"I've always kept the option opened in my mind, but since I found out I'm going to have a baby the ideas been in my head more often than most" she spoke taking a deep breath before continuing.

"With my parents gone and a baby on the way, I feel that Hogwarts would be the best place for me, at least for now. I've always thought of this place as a home where I'm accepted and I don't want to lose that also." She finished before glancing at Minerva to see how her words were taken.

She was shocked to see Minerva's eyes were watery. But before she could say anything Minerva spoke.

"My dear girl you an inspiration to all, you've gone threw so much and as much as I wish to say that it's over I think we both know that I would be lying. There will be many trials ahead for us all including you some will be a walk in the park compared to the ones you face now but others will be worse than this." Minerva said taking a breath trying to rein in her emotions before continuing.

"But with all that has happened and all that will happen I know that you will come out on top, like always. You have an inner strength that few have seen before." Minerva finished.

Hermione felt the tears sliding down her cheek that was just what she need; no one besides her parent had ever said anything like that to her before. She impulsively leaned over and gave her Head of House a hug.

Minerva hugged her back.


	18. Chapter 18

Heidi191976- thank you for your review

Only one review I hope that as I begin to update more you all will review. This isn't my favorite story anymore and I would be more than happy to but it out to pasture, I was just going to finish it for the readers. But if know one is still reading then I can stop. So let me know if you're still reading.

-- -- --

"My dear Minerva what can I do for you on this wondrous night?" Albus Dumbledore asked sitting back in his desk chair with a smile.

"I've just returned from a meeting with Miss. Granger" Minerva said taking a seat at the headmaster's desk.

"Oh" the headmaster said intrigue filling his features.

"Not to worry, nothing is amiss but Miss. Granger did bring up the subject of becoming an apprentice to one of the teachers after her NEWTS are completed." Minerva said reaching for the tea that magically appeared as usual when she was in his office.

"Hmm I see, what are your thoughts on the subject my dear?" Albus asked looking thoughtful.

"I see no reason to deny her request, except for Severus." Minerva replied before taking a sip of her tea.

"Yes that could problematic" Albus said in a far off voice.

"I'm not sure I'd even know how to rectify the situation, because the dear girl doesn't have all her memories, and once she does the final verdict will be up to her" she spoke with a tense look filling her face making her seem older than she was.

Silence filled the room as the greatest wizard the world had ever seen pondered the situation.

"I do believe that we will reserve any decision until the time is right. I would never turn away a student, whether present or former. Severus is an irreplaceable asset to the order and a brilliant mind that few can match let alone beat. Miss. Granger is, despite present circumstances a witch on her way to the history books, but I will not make a decision until I see how the progress with each other" Dumbledore expressed his brilliant mind with his words.

"I for one agree that it would be best not to tell Miss. Granger that it depends on her relationship with Severus. I feel the strain of knowing that her chance depend on her and Severus relationship would cause strain on there already thin relationship, but what will you do if they don't progress accordingly?" Minerva asked her voice higher than normal due to the worry she felt growing inside her.

"As I said I would never turn away a student, if Severus and Miss. Granger's feeling towards each other do not progress as I hope they shall then I will make other arrangements for her. I will not leave her to the wolves. I had already thought of this for I fear that Voldemort will learn of her conception and wish to harm her and her child" Albus replied his voice showing strain.

"I understand your fear, and agree but shouldn't we explain that to Miss. Granger so she won't place herself in any risky situations?" Minerva inquired gently.

"Perhaps but at this moment I am content to simply let nature take its course I still worry about Miss. Grangers mental state, for it is on the edge of a cliff she will either cope accordingly and step back from the edge, or lose her balance and fall, becoming lost to us all" Albus said his voice grave.

"Do you really think her that weak Albus?" Minerva asked anger in her tone.

"Weak, no, never but her life has done turn over and everything she's ever known has changed, and nothing will ever be the same. Though I do believe that if anyone can come out through all of this standing it will be Miss. Granger." Albus said a twinkle in his eye.

"I do believe that your right, Albus as much as I had hoped for a instant decision I realize that there are to many unknown variables to make a correct decision when the future is unknown" Minerva said with a sight as she rubbed her temples from stress as she stood up to take her leave.

"Fear not my dear everything will progress as it's meant to" Albus said for his parting words.

Though she knew Albus was right it didn't hinder her worrying in the least how could you not worry with all that was happening each day in the world.

--

--

--

_The night hadn't been long enough for Severus, none of them were as he rolled over debating whether or not he wanted to stay in bed for a few more minutes or awake fully for the hellish day that was in store for him he bumped something warm. _

_Sitting up quickly he took in the sight a women was in his private rooms. Had he done anything last night? No he'd headed straight to bed after working on his lesson plans for Miss. Grangers, tutoring sessions. _

_He was about to jump out of bed and fire call Lucius to see what kind of prank this way and why he had felt the need to pull it when the body next to his turned and began to awake. What he saw made his jaw drop._

_Miss. Granger was in his private bed chamber, heavily pregnant with their child_

"_Morning love, how did you sleep?" The heavily pregnant Hermione asked as she maneuvered her hand to caress his arm._

"_Fine and yourself?" Severus asked not sure what was happening she hadn't been this far along days ago._

"_Wonderful that backrub you gave me last night helped me sleep better than I have since before I was pregnant" Hermione said as she sat up and gave him a long kiss._

_Severus was stunned into silence._

"_I love you" Hermione said snuggling towards his body forcing him to lay back down, while laying her head on his chest her finger moving in gentle patterns along his skin._

"_And I always will" Hermione said planting a kiss on his chest with a smile, looking up at him with love and adoration clear in her eyes._

Gasping sat up quickly, realizing that it was only a dream a very wrong dream. Miss Granger was his student and though she was pregnant with his child that in know way made it alright to have thoughts of that nature about her.

He slowly laid back down trying to calm his heart rate down to its normal pace.

While he lay there alone trying to regain his sanity he couldn't help but realize just how lonely his rooms felt now that the dream was over.


	19. Notes

Hi,

Sadly this is not an update, BUT there will be new, edited updates filled with amazing content longer than 500 words! Isn't that great!!! It is, also all the chapters are going to be edited to make reading it easier!! Thanks to my new amazing beta Torete!!!

So don't give up on this story I haven't!!

Thanks!


	20. I'm sorry

To all of my Can You Deal readers;

I'm sorry to say despite my last post about re-posting the previous chapters and new chapters on the way that, that won't be happening. I can say without a doubt that I have the worst luck with beta's ever. They all seem to fade away after a while which is rather annoying and makes me feel horrible because I don't like leaving a story unfinished. But I am horrible at grammar and such; I prefer to have someone edit my chapters and love running my ideas by someone to make sure that they aren't total rubbish. If anyone is interested in becoming my beta for short or long term please let me know but only if you are extremely serious. If know one is interested then I'm sorry to say that unless I get another beta this story is definitely on hold indefinitely. I'm sorry about that everyone but its been so long since I've had a reliable beta that the idea for Can You Deal have dried up and I need a beta to help fill the dry well.

So if anyone is interested then please let me know, If not I'll work on finding another beta but with the luck I've had no promises.

Thank you for reading and I hope I can continue this story

Nocturnalrose


	21. HELP PLEASE!

Hello all my loyal readers!

First off this is not a AN saying I'm no longer writing. I'm just stuck on my stories. I'm asking for help. I'm looking for someone who reads my stories that doesn't mind knowing what might happen. I need someone I can bounce ideas off of. I don't want a 'yes' man or woman I want someone who will flat out tell me ' that idea sucks' .

I have limited time because of my job, I just recieved a promotion and knowing that I'm stuck on the next chapter doesn't help when trying to take time to write the next chapter. I want very much to finish my stories and I may only need help for this chapter, I'm not sure. I'm terribly stuck on this chapter and can't seem to see beyond it.

If anyone is willing to help that would be amazing! Please let me know you can private message me or review me or email.

Thank you all for sticking with me. Your reviews mean the world. I hope I'm able to find someone and mmove past this terrible block and continue writing for the stories you love!

Love Nocturnal Rose


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